Not The Onion

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Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

Links to news stories from...
...credible sources, with...
...their original headlines, that...
...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago

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Reminder: In addition to not being The Onion, this isn't a politics community (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

3 comments fedilink

Look, I get it. The gargantuan shit-show that is U.S. politics and the American descent into fascism is on everyone's minds. It's certainly on mine.

But the point of this community is to highlight weird news stories that make you go, "By golly, I thought I was reading a headline from The Onion. You know, America's finest news source." A lot of stories being posted lately don't even remotely fit that.

That doesn't mean political stories aren't allowed here, but they must have headlines that would make people pause and wonder if it's a story from The Onion. Straight up regular, non Onion-y headlines don't fit.

190

Idaho bans ‘Everyone Is Welcome Here’ classroom signs, calling them ideological (www.msnbc.com)

submitted 1 hour ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

25 comments fedilink

(After fighting Jake Paul on Saturday) Julio Cesar Chavez Jr arrested by ICE, facing immediate deportation (www.badlefthook.com)

submitted 8 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

4 comments fedilink

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/32429056

569

British Airways crew mistakenly booked into a sex dungeon and were kept awake by 24-hour orgy. (www.thesun.co.uk)

submitted 1 day ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

81 comments fedilink

309

UFC confirms Trump's plan to host a fight at White House in 2026 (www.nbcnews.com)

submitted 2 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

50 comments fedilink

120

Xbox Producer Recommends Laid Off Workers Should Use AI To 'Help Reduce The Emotional And Cognitive Load That Comes With Job Loss' (aftermath.site)

submitted 3 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

3 comments fedilink

"Sorry we fired you, have you tried talking to an LLM about it? Our therapists are only for people that are worth talking to."

117

Decline in tourist numbers to Japan blamed on manga's disaster prediction (www.abc.net.au)

submitted 3 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

16 comments fedilink

In short:

Japan has seen a decline in tourists, especially from China, with some citing a disaster prediction in a manga (Japanese comic book) that was first published in 1999.

The manga The Future I Saw details the dreams of the author, including one that some believe predicted Japan's tsunami in 2011.

What's next?

The manga's reprint in 2021 triggered rumours a catastrophic event would occur on July 5, 2025, which has sparked concerns from some superstitious tourists about travelling to Japan.

221

Trump promotes UFC fight at White House in 2026 (www.msn.com)

submitted 3 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

17 comments fedilink

Full on Idiocracy now

125

Gaming takes the helm: aircraft carrier installs high-end eSports suite for crew (www.techspot.com)

submitted 3 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

18 comments fedilink

In a nutshell: While modern aircraft carriers are gigantic vessels packed with amenities one might not expect to see on a warship, the UK Royal Navy's HMS Prince of Wales has something unique: a full eSports/gaming suite for the crew to compete against each other.

In February, permission was given to set up the suite on the 1,600-crew carrier as part of a partnership between the Royal Navy and the British eSports Federation.

The gaming room includes 12 high-end Alienware Aurora R15 gaming desktop PCs, featuring RTX 4080 graphics cards and Core i7 CPUs – the systems are capable of running far more than just low-demand eSports games. The room also has LED lights, a widescreen TV, and office chairs.

404

Tesla Will Now Let You Finance Your EV Repairs… With Interest Rates as High as 36% APR (fuelarc.com)

submitted 4 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

52 comments fedilink

With Tesla, you can turn a $2,442 windshield installation into a $3,174 windshield installation through the power of interest.

This is being reported by the Teslasphere as an "excellent option" to restore affordability to a car market that desperately needs more affordability.

Only, neither of those numbers is even in the same ballpark as affordable.

402

[Non-News] An official US Government account posted this (lemmy.world)

submitted 4 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

24 comments fedilink

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/32380509