this post was submitted on 09 Sep 2024
1298 points (97.7% liked)

Greentext

4663 readers
1202 users here now

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
(page 7) 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Typically parking lots are filled with cars, and I need to drive between the parked cars. If a cart is in the way it makes it harder for me to leave, just saying

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 31 points 3 months ago (3 children)

That goes for everything you can return but don't have to. You can throw your trash away after the movie, you don't have to leave it in the theatre.

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

Depends on your beliefs. There are people who believe in being judged for every action by an almighty force or being, so it's probably not absolutely perfect. I might be smitten in my next life for it.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

I was concerned this was going to be a comment about what I put in my shopping cart.

But I can tell I'm an individual of extreme self-discipline because after I filled my shopping cart with chocolate and vodka I return it to the carousel.

Everyone praised me.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 3 months ago

I agree that people should put the carts where they go, but this whole "I'm a better human because I put carts back" thing just reeks of unredeemable people scouring their existence for a single redeeming property.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Plot twist: I don't use a shopping cart. (I always use the textile shopping bag that I bring from home.)

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago (2 children)

That's considered a security concern in most grocery stores where I live. There are signs telling you not to place any items in your shopping bags until you've paid for them. You must use a cart or waste several minutes hunting around the entrance or registers trying to find where they hid one of their 10 shopping baskets.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago (4 children)

Wow, what kind of dystopia do you live in? In my town, they're just happy you went to their store, and I presume cracking down on what little shoplifting there is would drive away more business than it saves.

load more comments (4 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

This got me thinking, what is a "true neutral" position.

Finding another cart which isn't returned, and adding yours to it.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

True neutral is carrying everything in your hands and avoiding the issue entirely.

Chaotic neutral is using a hand basket and putting it into an abandoned cart when you're done.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

Lawful good is returning the cart to the in store area (or wherever people generally get their carts from). Or returning more than just your cart to the corals in the lot. Might return a row of carts to the store while they grab theirs from the coral.

Neutral good is gathering some carts from the lot and making sure they aren't taking up parking spots, though not necessarily returning them to the coral or store.

Chaotic good is grabbing one of ones randomly left out there and giving it to others who are going in to the store and grabbing another one for yourself. Cart may or may not be left in the coral after, though it's at least left where it won't be in the way.

Lawful neutral returns their cart and maybe others if they aren't out of the way. Might freak out on someone who doesn't return their cart.

True neutral sometimes returns it, sometimes doesn't, sometimes grabs a loose cart, sometimes grabs one from the store area. Overall doesn't make things better or worse, but individual episodes can do so.

Chaotic neutral picks a random (to us, they might have their reasons) cart in the middle of a row, pulling the other carts out enough to access that cart. May or may not return those other carts to the row. May or may not push their cart towards a coral when they leave. Most likely to be seen pushing a cart while driving their car, either with the cart at the front of the car or holding it through an open window (which might not even be the usual driver's window). I'd call Mr Bean chaotic neutral, so anything he is capable of.

Lawful evil returns the carts to the coral but stacks incompatible carts with each other or might put it in backwards. Follows the rules in a way that makes you wish they hadn't. Might stick a tack in one of the wheels so it won't turn properly.

Neutral evil scatters carts to cause the most inconvenience. Doesn't just block parking spots but might block car paths or entrances and exits to the store. Might overturn their cart. Might ram it into someone's car. Might fight employees that try to gather carts.

Chaotic evil super glues wheels so they won't turn or glues carts to each other and in the coral or to the door. Or might take one of those carts that are tethered such that they seize the brakes from one store and leave it in another store's lot. Or might figure out how to trigger that without the cart leaving (the other evils might also do this one). Or might just burn down the store after returning their cart to the in store area, letting any observers briefly think they had changed. Might turn the parking lot into a crash up derby and refer to pedestrians as bonus points.

load more comments
view more: ‹ prev next ›