this post was submitted on 25 Jun 2025
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[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago (2 children)

So what did he call it then? Half-Dandy, Semi-Sly, Republican?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

Probably a slur

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 days ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago
[–] [email protected] 96 points 2 days ago (8 children)

At first read, I thought the dad was confessing to cheating on OP's mum with dudes but now my question is...then what did the dad think it was?

"Bisexual" isn't really a new term. And for someone who has been fucking around, you think they would've run into the term sooner.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 2 days ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)
  1. It doesn't say he's cheating, he could mean in his entire life he had sex with others including men, but now with their mom he doesn't.
  2. If he's still having sex with others, it doesn't have to be cheating. They can have an open relationship or be ~~polygamous~~ polyamorous.
  3. It nowhere says he's still together with their mom.

You're making assumptions.

Edit: spelling mistake.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

Just a comment, you've said "Polygamous" where the correct word is "Polyamorous". They are not the same. Polygamy is marriage of multiple partners, often in "sister-wives" situations and often related to patrocentric power expectations in certain smaller religious instituions and cults. Polyamory is a romantic orientation allowing for multiple romantic or sexual partners. While the type of polycule a polyamorous person engages in will vary from person to person, the harem of wives thing doesn't really happen in polyamorous circles.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago

Polygamy, polygyny, and polyamory are all separate things, basically

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago

You are completely correct, I think I made a spelling error and autocorrect changed it to this without me realizing. I'm polyamorous myself :)

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

For doing such a close reading on the OP, you really skimped on my comment. Y'know, where I said "on first read" before amending with "but now", meaning I had one assumption but it shifted.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Yet you made the assumption, wrote it down, and moved focus on something else instead of saying it doesn't have to be cheating. There's still a statement where you say you think he confessed to cheating, which I think is an assumption which doesn't have to be true, as I explained.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 day ago

I also don't think it has to be true. That's why I stopped thinking it and thought the other thing.

I'm gonna stop here, m8. You're feeling some type of way, you've taken your own reading of what I wrote, and I'm not interested.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 days ago (1 children)

It definitely wasn’t mainstream here in the Netherlands up until the mid 1990’s from my perspective. Any guy who did things with another guy was ‘gay’, irrespective of anything that they might engage in with women.

I imagine if that guy grew up in say, the 70’s UK, they genuinely might not have been aware that ‘bisexual’ was a thing you could be.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

It still is in a lot of cultures.

You can hook up with millions of women but you accidentally blow a guy and everyone labels you gay.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

Do they cal me John the Jane fucker? No. Do they call me John the Mary fucker? No. But you fuck one goat....

[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 days ago

I can imagine him just living a hippie life, not putting labels on things, just shagging whomever he felt like.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 days ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

I mean the modern use of the word is a little bit new. Depending on when this story happened and how old dad is he genuinely might not know the term. The first bisexuality groups were only created in the 80s and then it still took a while for it to be mainstream. Even bi icons like Freddie Mercury would only be seen as bisexual until much more recently.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

It might take time to be mainstream but this dude was apparently banging everything that moved. He wasn't mainstream, he was in the niche. I guess it does depend on when he was hoe-ing around. Assuming that OP is coming out to his father now(ish, don't know the exact year) means his dad had to be going gangbusters in the 80s to 90s, after bisexuality as a term was rolling around.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

It's in the past tense though; we don't have to assume it was now-ish.

(I want to believe!)

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 days ago

cheating

We often forget some people do have lives before they "settle down" and get married.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Maybe the reason is that it's fiction?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago

username checks out

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 days ago

are you saying someone lied to us?

propostrotous

[–] [email protected] 76 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Dude has no time for some useless words. He's shaggin, and everybody knows. xD

[–] [email protected] 40 points 2 days ago

That dad fucks

[–] [email protected] 64 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

Some people are really detached from the culture they live in.

Or it could be made up. Who knows?

But I can definitely attest to some older folk not knowing what 'bisexual' means, especially in a rural or semirural area.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I remember during the AIDS crisis health workers starteed to use the phrase "Men who have Sex with Men" in their education outreach partly because a significant number of these men did not self-identify as gay or bi.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

As someone who is deep into cruising culture, very many “straight” men sleep with dudes. They’d never be in a relationship with another guy, but they don’t care who sucks their dick.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Can confirm. I had an older coworker come out to me by saying that her husband "never judged her for having girlfriends in the past", but didn't know the language around it. She was treated so poorly by so many people that she didn't feel like a part of the gay community, moreso ashamed and judged. She couldn't talk to people about it, so when would she have learned those words?

Sometimes it takes someone younger being open about it for the older generation to even realize that there are words for it now.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Which is also weird, because girlfriend can also mean a platonic female friendship.

Rather inconsistent use of language actually.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

How dare they

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 days ago

Hell, you're lucky he switched from anal, time to time. 🤷🏼‍♂️

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago
[–] [email protected] 95 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Check out dad, whoring it up like a champ.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

Well, maybe just slutting it up; no idea if he went pro

[–] [email protected] 40 points 2 days ago

Same

"At least you don't have it from strangers".

[–] [email protected] 130 points 2 days ago

How I Eventually Met Your Mother.

[–] [email protected] 198 points 2 days ago (1 children)

You don't say? We used to just call that fuckin'!

[–] [email protected] 101 points 2 days ago

What will the kids today think of next!