andros_rex

This is the “Emergency Certified” Teacher Facebook group.

These people possibly have bachelor’s degrees, but in subjects completely unrelated to the subjects they will be teaching.

Common complaints are about the tests being too hard (they aren’t, you can memorize the questions on fucking quizlet).

My first year teaching I was pulled aside and told by my principal, “you actually have a degree in this, you’ll have to step in to help your team” - because the other science teachers were a Physical Education teacher and the schools secretary.

But no f-ggots allowed! Being a drag queen on the weekends disqualifies you to be a school principal now, no matter how good you were at it.

A lovely book of retro shitposts/meme-ery.

inb4 the inevitable jokes, this is a genuine question.

I’m learning to juggle, I’ve got a lot of experience doing different kinds of presentations for children, I thrifted a guide to making balloon animals and will buy supplies to practice if I end up winning an Amazon gift card at work.

The other things I imagine I would need are getting the make up down. I’d love to go to Mooseburger, but financially not in the cards.

How does one start doing festivals? Making money would be nice, but I’d be happy to do things like kids hospitals for free.

Isn’t Union Carbide so helpful?

I’ve been trying to get the sexual and physical abuse of children at a “hospital” investigated for more than a year now. I told OCCY that all they would need to do is go in and look at the camera footage, they told me that I should break in and get it myself.

In the year since I’ve started trying to get an investigation started, another child has died. (OCCY refuses to comply with Open Records Act requests on why a child died there in 2003… almost like they’re covering up something.)

What a great state! Imagine That!

The paint is about a centimeter thick. Going to cut it and make “fordite” if I can manage to thrift a rock tumbler.

I had $50 in venmo, which I used to purchase groceries, because my bank account is currently negative.

Instead of using the $50 in my bank account, instead, a week later the $50 came out of my bank account, not touching the Venmo balance at all.

So now I have an overdraft fee, effectively meaning I paid 1.5 times for those groceries.

I don’t have “overdraft protection,” I’ve told my bank I don’t want overdrafts to go through, but fuck me for being poor I guess.

I’m being currently subjected to a Peppa Pig marathon as I watch my nephew. They are visiting the zoo.

Some kinds of animals are clearly “people” - like Peppa and the zookeepers. But other animals are non speaking - animals. They showed non talking penguins eating fish - are fish not “people” either?

The zookeeper is a lion who confuses the teacher - some sort of gazelle - with a wildebeest as a running joke, which seems to suggest that he thinks of her as food.

Some of the jokes in this show seem targeted to adults, which makes no sense, as absolutely nothing in this show is watchable to anyone above the age of 4.