You may fascinate a woman with a bowl of stew.
this post was submitted on 25 Jul 2024
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Used to be a cook and I can't tell you how often "going out is expensive, I could cook you something better" used to work in my youth
"it worked on me too" - OP is slightly ambiguous about how the story ends.
Then you follow him home, the door opens and another guy shakes your hand and says "Hi, I'm Stu."
violent story, cannibalism, gunshot, satire, fbi agent
It turns out that "this dude" is a serial killer and cannibal.
Stu, who has been his roommate for the past month, and Angela, who may soon be dead, are both terrified upon realizing this.
The man-eater locks the door, trapping them.
— Well, well, well... look at what we have here! Fresh meat. — he says, menacingly.
Little did the man know that Stu was actually an FBI agent sent to investigate cannibals. Sounds of gunshot are heard from the cannibal's home. Stu saves the day yet again. The end. And everyone clapped, menacingly.
this comment felt like i got punched in the chest
thanks
A girl once asked my friend and I if she could make us an omelette. We'd never met her before, but said yeah why not. We went back to our flat, like 1AM, she made us an omelette and then left. Never saw her again. Bizarre. Good omelette though.
When someone offers to make you an omelette, you can expect a reasonably good omelette
You've been visited by the Omelette du Goblin. Pay tribute with a Dexter's Lab short or be visited one again.
Hands off my stew, harlot!
Hands off my harlot, Stu!
He's not wrong. I've brought women home many times by cooking for them. Guys, learn a few easy recipes and you won't regret it. My go to is chicken and broccoli alfredo or carbonara fettuccine.
My favorite go to recipe is a lentil soup with spinach, lime, coconut milk, and curry. It's really refreshing, especially after a hard day of carrying bridges across the Shattered Plains.
That sounds delicious, and healthy!
Always a risk that airsick lowlanders may not like it though
When I was dating that was basically my go-to reason for inviting someone over, but that usually was at least 3-5 dates in. Usually we'd have eaten at cool restaurants where we've had full blown conversations about food, and where I'll have introduced the idea that I'm a great cook who knows what I'm doing, and then at a certain point I'd offer my place for a dinner date, and then show off. And we'd already be alone at my place so it wasn't that much of a stretch for them to stay over.
Honestly I don't know how I would've approached dating if I didn't know how to cook.
I tried that once. She ate my Thai curry, made polite conversation, and left.
Still a nice evening, though.
Maybe she hates curry
Try roasting the broccoli first, assuming you don't already.
Good suggestion. I usually steam them since I like the florets still crunchy. I'll try roasting next time!
It brings out a whole new world of flavor. Truly surprising. Just toss with a little olive oil and bake at 450 degrees for 15 minutes or so.
Found Benjamin Sisko's account.
But yeah, even simple cooking is great.
Found Benjamin Sisko’s account.
Nothing sexier than a belly full of cream and cheese.
Crock pot stew is barely any effort too
Yet they taste so good on a winter day
A man that has his own place and can cook? Hell I'd be eating there in no time.
Bro's running an Inn.
More like a broth-el 🥸
Fuck off lmao. I love these but feel like such an idiot when I laugh at them.
Me too. I laughed like a maniac at it and then felt bad I had no one to share the joke with.
By the way, my name is Stu