this post was submitted on 30 Jun 2025
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Just bought box wine the other day cuz I knew I had to have a super uncomfortable conversation that could not be avoided and I needed to be anaesthetized for it

It worked and I know in retrospect I really needed it to be that way

Edit/Update: person I had convo with just texted me and apologized for combativeness and I mutually apologized for not dealing with it sooner and we're along and on to solution mode. The system works, please dont drink if you dont have too but dont forbid yourself from using a tool to improve your situation and try to always be honest. The less you lie or hide, the less influence you will have to unnecessarily drink

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago

Everyone high roading you here is probably on anti-anxiety meds lol

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

I know everyone in here’s saying no but I do. If I’m going to a social occasion I might have a drink beforehand; not much, just enough to feel it. I’m not the most comfortable in social situations and a beer can just take the edge off. I don’t get drunk or anything and I’d only do it if there’s going to be alcohol there anyway.

I also drink sometimes to help me sleep. I have ADHD and I struggle to switch my brain off. Sometimes I hit like 2am and if I think I need it I have a bottle of whisky downstairs that I’ll go and have a drink off. Again, just enough to feel it. I have pills and medicine that help me sleep, and they work also, but they leave me feeling groggy the next day. With a little whisky I don’t even feel it the next day and it seems to work just as well. I don’t do it too often, maybe once every 3 or 4 weeks.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I strategically refrain from alcohol or other drug consumption. And my life has improved drastically ever since.

Whatever the reason that you feel you have to abuse drugs as a coping mechanism, it will only make things worse. You will not be able to process your emotions, you will not be able to think clear about what is your best way forward and you will not be able to grow stronger while drugged up.

The fact that you say you "needed to be anesthetized" for an uncomfortable conversation screams that you are either already having a drug abuse problem and that you have issues with your emotional regulation.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 days ago

I am glad this is working for you, but not everyone has the same caustic relationship with recreational drugs that you do. Alcohol has been around since over 5000 years BC, but somehow you and a great deal of others have gone on this mini "prohibition" movement and have it all figured out. Good for you, but let's not let this turn into a new movement where "I know better than you" becomes an excuse to tell others how to live their lives. Prohibition in the US started just like this.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

PSA to the youngs who see Box of Wine and think QUANTITY.

Box of wine actually stays best longest because the tapped bag doesn't take in O2 and start to sour. So box wine is usually pretty par for paced domestic drinking and cooking.

I'm sure someone has smashed the box, but they also serve people who are more likely to leave the last glass in the bottle too long.

Bought Box does not mean Drank Box.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

Short answer... no. Long answer... Noooooooooooooooooooo

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Hmmm, may drink strategically to dodge rules like no self brought alcohol on the festival, or a way to feel the effect good enough before needing to run to the bus.

But to deal with drama? No that I'm taking fully in so I can learn from it if something similar happens again

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

I do this every time I go visit my father. His wife is a crazy narcissistic loon and I just cannot fucking stand being around her, so I drink when I'm there because it's the only way I can tolerate being around her. But my dad drinks with me, so I dunno, our relationship has been so strained and awkward for so long, I think we both do it to ease some of that tension.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

I mean, you could call it strategic, or you could call it relying on substances as a crutch to manage your emotions.

I'm not saying that's always bad, necessarily. There is the school of thought that it's just a tool, like in your edit. But, it's important to remember it can become a habit.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

These days i rarely drink but a glass of wine with some pasta now and again goes down a treat

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

I do, but the other way as I'm getting old and can't down them like I used to. Met up with a mate to watch the F1 in the pub garden on a sunny Sunday, just had a couple of halves as I still wanted to try a number of new drops

Though I completely understand using alcohol to loosen up a bit, for numerous social situations. Definitely used it more that way in my younger days, to varying degrees of success

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Using alcohol as a method to resolve personal problems can be a very dark path. Please be careful.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 days ago

I've been doing "tipsy chore day" for a while. Do a chore > glass of wine > do another chore > glass of wine.... I may as well finish the bottle > do a chore > final glass.

Chores are less boring, and you push through them to get your next glass. Has to be wine though, beer I don't get a buzz going, and spirits have me incompetent.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 days ago

Sure, but I was also an alcoholic. Very high functioning, but still at the end 100% dependant on it.

The slope is so treacherously flat, you don't feel yourself slipping. I still have no idea how I ended up where I did, or for that matter how I ended up actually managing to quit.

I'm sure some people can use liquid courage without it turning into depending on it to do the hard things, then more and more things turning hard and needing a boost to do it, or can wash away work with a drink at the end of the week, without having to wash it away at the end of every day, and then having a quick rinse-and-reset at lunch, and so on... But it's impossible to know which one you are until it's too late.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

Yes, my strategy is I don't drink and in turn I don't get hangovers

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 days ago

Anxiety is necessary sometimes. It’s fine to be anxious and it’s ok to be uncomfortable. You are having trouble managing your anxiety seek a therapist. Alcohol will trick you into thinking it’s a solution. Be careful, this is very similar to how my alcoholism and my fathers started.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

I bought a pocket breathalyzer so I can be right in the pocket

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

As a general policy I don't drink alcohol if I feel I need a drink.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Uncomfortable? I'd prefer caffeine for that.

Alcohol might compel me to say something I'd regret.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

That would likely make the anxiety worse

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

Exercise then?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

I like to have a drink but hard NO to doing it before anything important. I strongly prefer to feel clear headed for those moments.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

Yes, I barely if ever drink alcohol. I'm not social and hate talking to people or crowds, I'm also pretty ND so I can't fake or pretend I give a shit about what other people are talking.

Alcohol helps a lot, if I have to meet whoever and their friends and they're asking me about work or how I would design an app that does blah blah I definitely need to be like 4 beers in to tolerate that conversation.

That being said I don't drink for things like school presentations or other events that require me to speak, like conference stuff. I just bite the bullet and it sucks, but I'd rather be sober and speaking coherently than feeling like I am.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

My baseline circadian rhythm doesn't let me get sleepy until the sun starts coming up. In a bygone era, I would've been the guy tending the fire and watching over the camp until the early birds got up. In the modern era, night shift jobs are generally terrible. I strategically drink to fall asleep at a somewhat reasonable hour, so I can participate in modern society.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Lots of people warning you about alcoholism. Idk. I drink coffee strategically every day, and that's a drug. But also yes, I sometimes drink alcohol strategically. If I know I'm going to hang out with my sister who I love but disagree with on many many things, i have a drink or two. I try to dull my brain just enough that I am too slow to get offended at every single thing (or just don't care to, maybe?) in the end, we have a great time, I don't get all debate-ey with her, and instead just appreciate the good things about her. We don't see each other that often so I genuinely don't see any danger from this coping mechanism.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

A caffeine addiction and an alcohol addiction are two completely different beasts though.

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