Your feelings are yours, personally I'd just wallow in it and feel it and do absolutely nothing about it, you don't need to tell her, a crush is by definition sort of a fantasy thing. It's not her, it's some dream person you've attached to her. But I'm old so have been through this more times. It gets easier and then it gets fun.
this post was submitted on 27 Jan 2024
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Shit yourself in front of her. You may need to prepare with laxative beforehand.
They call me "big cat" cause ima puma pants
I saw your post the other day and didn't have anything constructive to add (my instinct was to say 'just see where it goes, but don't force it to be romantic', but I know so little about the situation that it's hollow advice), but I came across this article in the NY Times that might speak to your situation. It talks about limerence, which is a new word for me. I say might, because it might not be what you're feeling, but it's worth a read regardless, and the tips on how to overcome it in the article seem useful (and have backing by different researchers, so they're bound to have more material on the subject that would be potentially related to what you're going through).
Gift link so no paywall: https://www.nytimes.com/2024/01/27/style/limerence-addiction-love-crush.html?unlocked_article_code=1.RU0.qcHQ.OMOM2nOkSCqy&smid=url-share
Imagine her picking her nose and eating the booger. Next, imagine her taking a huge stinky steaming dump. Disclaimer: only works if you're not German.
Or Cartman's mother.
You and your dance instructor should hang out and take molly together.
All this advise is making me realize it wasn't just a crush.
I've not seen her for years, I try my best to have contempt for her, I don't look her up or make any sort of contact. She's dead as far as I know, and that's kinda how it feels. But I think about her often, I think about the regrets. It's been years of no contact and I'm still mourning losing this "crush"
I’ve found that when I want to kill a crush I can start looking for characteristics I dislike. Everyone has them and early on in infatuation we gloss over them. But intentionally highlight them and that crush usually goes away pretty quick. Works for me anyway
She kicks puppies for fun and idolizes Hitler but God damn she's sexy.
Really? Man, I always thought it was to study their routines and plan the murder for when they are most alone and have the site and a grave prepared. Ideally away from prying eyes unless you like the thrill of getting caught or whatever....
But that aside, this is really solid advice. Nitpicking things you don't like is a great option towards losing interest.
Don't jerk off thinking about her
Come out of the closet as asexual and aromantic and the issue will disappear like a puff of smoke.
NOTE: this strategy could have negative consequences if you live in a country that doesn't recognize LGBT rights.
I first read that as "asexual and aromatic" and I was like, ... Well, i guess if you don't like sex and you smell like garlic....
Even my keyboard thought I meant to say "aromatic"
Would asexuals really have that bad of a time in a country that is not that supportive of LGBT? I don't think not wanting to have sex is seen as bad by people who dislike LGBT?
Any religious argument against LGBT folks works just as well on Ace folks. (Which is to say they don't, but the people making the arguments think they do)
In my country especially (it's Morocco), so many people think it's a bad idea to not get married and not have children (which requires sex anyway) simply because it's so engrained in our society to do that. Blame the state religion.
Idk why, but when I told my dad I wanna be celibate, he called me an atheist, which I'm not.
Also, asexualism is technically a part of LGBT, just in a very secondary manner. If people know about the full picture, they'll start threatening you.
I'm pretty much the same as you. I just do my hobbys or play games and such. You slowly forget about her, trust me.
Didn't work for me. It's been fucking 4 years.
Then I doubt it's a crush.
What it's then?
Play Baldurs Gate 3 and crush hard on your companions.
2 methods that I can think-of that might work, quickly enough for you:
-
deliberately develop a crush on someone else, like Lena Headey, or someone, whom you are not going to meet weekly, and
-
deliberately imagine her having total romancing with someone whom you both respect, value, & wouldn't violate-their-boundaries.
Obviously, combining these 2 methods would be stronger.
Salut, Namaste, & Kaizen
_ /\ _
Tell her. Then she likely rejects your feelings, and you distance yourself from her to kill the feelings.
That would most likely make being in the class awkward as well.
Lol that's not even close to real awkwardness of letting romantic feelings develop to crazy levels and end up friendzoned or worse. We need to be men and avoid falling a victim to our own naivety.
Also, that's also why I said to distance from her, which includes not taking classes with her anymore.
What if it's the only dance class in the area?
Yeah. It's super scary but it's really the most optimal route. I fell in love with a friend, told her, she said she doesn't feel the same way but we still remain friends and after a period of awkwardness it got back to the way it was before. We live in different parts of the world most of the year so nothing would really change one way or another, but still, it was easier to get things out in the open.
Just should tell her in a non-creepy casual way and it should be fine.
This is what I was thinking.
Either she rejects and that's a big turn off for the very obvious reason of her not wanting to be with OP (or it should be), or she accepts and it could be great. Nothing to lose.
Yeah that's based on this Doctor's talk on avoiding friendzone https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KtkL40jRLvU
I learned this the hard way and it hurts a lot still
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