this post was submitted on 26 Feb 2024

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128

At what age do you think is too old to be living with parents? (lemmy.world)

submitted 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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Background+rant: I'm in my early to mid-20s and still living at home with my dad. I'm not a NEET and am employed at a normal office job. I enjoy the comfort of my home. I like being with family (and I believe they feel blessed to have their kid at home longer). I like not having to pay rent. However, I also keep feeling some nagging pressure to "grow up and leave the nest".

Everything in my mind tells me that moving out is irrational. I would lose 1/3rd of my income to rent, go through a bunch of logistical hoops to find a new place, lose the last few moments I have with my family, just so I can prove to nobody that I'm independent, maybe discover new things, and also probably get in on some of that loneliness action that the rest of my generation is going through.

Yet, the pressure is still there. No one looks down on me for it, but I feel a bit embarrassed to tell people I'm living at home, like I'm admitting failure or incompetency. My friends will occasionally ask when I'm planning on moving out and the question just lingers longer than it should in my head. I compare myself to my parents and grandparents and can't help but feel like a child compared to the people they were when they were at my age.

Obviously quite conflicted on this, so I'm interested in seeing what others have to say.

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago (6 children)

Do you do your own laundry?

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago

I don't think there is truly such a thing as too old. I would still live at home if I could I think, I like having people I care about around. That being said, it's more a question of if it works for your family and you. If they are cool with it and you are in a position where you're comfortable I don't see an issue. maybe talk to them about it.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago

I moved out of my parents place for good just before I hit 25. I left because I moved to a bigger city with more job opportunities.

I was too horribly depressed at the time for this to be a factor, but it might be easier convincing someone to come back to your place for sex if you’re living on your own compared to being with your parents.

If you move out, how much per month will you spend on rent, renters insurance (which most apartments will require), utilities, internet, etc? What percent of your take home pay would that be? If it’s too high, how does it change if you include a roommate or a less expensive place? If you move, will that make it easier or harder for you to take public transit to work?

[–] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago (2 children)

and I believe they feel blessed to have their kid at home longer)

Have you directly asked about this? That would be my first concern, do they truly want me living at home still? Moving out doesn't mean you have to never see family again, you can have a set day or two every week to come over for dinner/a visit.

The second concern I would have would be bringing a significant other around, or even a first date. You don't want to bring every person you go on a date with to meet the parents, only the ones that are serious.

So if you're family is actually okay with you staying, and you're okay with bringing dates home around then, then go for it. Doesn't seem to be hurting anyone.

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