i stopped taking adderoll cuz i have way more pride than i got sense and i can't abide having to take a drug test to prove I'm taking their shitty speed. plus all their bullshit acting like i can't have a 3 month supply cuz obviously id sell it or something.
im not gonna take that attitude from a drug dealer. fuuuuck.
but i am as i said very stupid
im confident now that this isnt annie but the computer lady in disguise
no matter the title i need like 10 fuckin years off fore I'll watch more capeshit. nothing against ppl that like it but enough. fuggen routine assed shit
the value of my piracy just jumped a billion beries!!
and dominoes is fucking garbage too, only pizza i ever threw away... i was hungry too, it was that bad
phone version of YouTube doesn't even tell me length of video wtf
it's nine minutes but i had to enable desktop mode to see that.
smh my head
i really hate how the US makes no bones about ownin' my ass. if one ever looks around, one finds benefits to citizenship are accidental, ancillary. you're their asset, born into and for the machine. fuckin'...fuckin'...
something clicked for me in what you wrote about open world games, and i think that for me, the main thing i GOTTA have for a game where you end up meandering about is: the movement itself has gotta feel joyful. like for example (since you didn't mention it) with Horizon: zero dawn, Aloy just felt so good to move (and fight) with that it never felt like a chore to get where i was going. i never even used mounts, they weren't as right as just runnin. it helps a lot to have meaningful goals or treasure to find, but there's always an ending of meaningful things if you play enough. for me if its ever boring to get there the game is on borrowed time
this is so stupid I'm actually angry it exists
Just because you're inside you doesn't mean you know yourself best. Maybe in fact you are too close to see the real you.
it worries me to see you talking so casual about pushing folks, both family and friends, away.
You show your clear eyes in this post, how you know you are very harsh on yourself, but then in this same post you deny others any right to give you an ounce of grace, to show you the beautiful person they see, the person they want to continue to know.
You shut them out from yourself, framing it here as 'what is best for them', but i believe that is a lie you're telling yourself to protect your own heart.
You demand perfection from yourself. You must make the right choice for everyone involved at all times. This is an extremely, impossibly high standard, doomed to fail, cuz youre a human.
When you inevitably fail to meet that lofty perfection, you shut down and shut out everyone else, "protecting them"...from what exactly? Your humanity? let them decide. its dismissing to them to make that choice for them, they don't need protection from you.
Humans make mistakes, hurt others on accident, even with the best intentions. You know this, but still try to be better than human, a higher standard than is possible to achieve. It can't be done, and you're hurting yourself by trying, setting yourself up to fail, and when it inevitably happens you're hurting yourself, cutting out those close to you who care.
tldr give yourself more grace and love, and if you can't, at least listen and don't shut out people that want to be around you. They can see things you don't see, and help be a bulwark against your exacting self-eval