Meta posting opens the door to shame and ridicule. I've already seen this happen by browsing the modlog a few times - it just got handled and i think that it's absolutely good it was handled. i think there's nothing to really say about MA that can't be discussed as issues arise, privately. For better or worse, there are people who enjoy wrecking stuff like it. Issues with specific users can be handled by mods and admins - a lot of what can be said about it would be to curtail or limit the function of MA - the additional burden would be suppressive of use.
Please don't give any room to the sorts who want to metapost about mutual aid - I'm sure some folks mean well, but it's just going to enable drama that doesn't need exist and will impede function
i invoke my dead name in the past tense to quote people talking to/at me, but otherwise i refer to past self as my chosen name.
using the new name is more respectful, helps you learn the name yourself, helps you associate that person with the new name, and using the deadname just means you're more likely to use it in even less justifiable contexts.
I dont even hate my dead name! I made it my middle name! but absolutely still... use the new name.