this post was submitted on 16 Oct 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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(page 3) 28 comments
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[–] [email protected] 63 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I remember seeing a FB post ages ago, of some dude saying that he went to Japan to tattoo "God is faithful" in Japanese because he didn't trust local tattooists to write it right. The post was a photo of the tattoo on the dude's arm.

Someone pointed that it said something along the lines of "idiot stranger".

Mr "I went to Japan" complained that was impossible, because he went to Japan.

The other person posted a screenshot of the kanji on google translate and lo, "idiot stranger"

[–] [email protected] 34 points 1 day ago (7 children)

Even the premise: why would you want a Christian message in Japanese?

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[–] [email protected] 97 points 1 day ago (23 children)

I was thinking of getting 何か日本語で "nanika nihongo de" and if someone would ask me what it meant I’d say "something in Japanese"

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

I dunno, I have some workout trousers with a Chinese logogram on them. Dunno what it means. Hope I won't ever

[–] [email protected] 162 points 1 day ago (8 children)

I knew a guy who had "bad to the bone" written on his neck in Chinese. The problem is, the phrase doesn't translate at all.

So, his tattoo read as "my bones are bad"

Tbf, he was a clown and had something like that coming.

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[–] [email protected] 133 points 1 day ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 56 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Ehm... isn't "日本" = "Japan" both in chinese and japanese?

Thats what google translate is telling me anyway

[–] [email protected] 42 points 1 day ago

That's actually hilarious.

[–] [email protected] 117 points 1 day ago

Not the first time I've Lemmied this story, and it's not a tattoo it's a motorcycle decal. Kid turns up on a Kawasaki forum to show off his Ninja's paint scheme, and on the front cowling are five kanji figures, the first and the third were identical. Someone asked "Why does your bike say 'pig dog pig bird horse?'" He says "Nah man, it says N-I-N-J-A. That's how you spell 'Ninja' in Japanese."

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I want "pretty nice and vanilla guy" tattooed on me, and I'll say it means "horrible pervert"

[–] [email protected] 38 points 1 day ago (3 children)

I bestow upon you the title of 凡人 (bonjin), in Japanese means an unremarkably mediocre person. You can tattoo it and tell people it means psychopath instead of course, who's stopping you?

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[–] [email protected] 238 points 1 day ago (8 children)

I know someone who has something tattooed on him: in Thai.

As in, it's a phrase which says 'in Thai' in Thai. So when people ask him, what is that? He says 'it's in Thai'. They say yes, but what is it? 'It's 'in Thai''. Yes, but...

You get the idea.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Tattooing yourself for the bit is next-level.

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 day ago

My sister's first year in college she got the Chinese word for LOVE tattooed. Later she found out it was the correct symbol, only mirrored. I called her EVOL for a while

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago

That's the kind of stupid I like.

[–] [email protected] 53 points 1 day ago

I have a tattoo that means "I don't know, I don't speak japanese." It works when an English speaker asks me what it means, and it also worked with the Japanese when I lived in Japan and didn't speak the language.

[–] [email protected] 52 points 1 day ago (2 children)

This is like setting your guest WiFi password to "It's on the wall over there."

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)
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[–] [email protected] 140 points 1 day ago (4 children)

Some guy came up to me when I first joined the military and told me "hey I got your name tattooed on my ass. Don't believe me?"

Sure enough there was "YOUR NAME" tattooed on his ass check. I'm pretty sure he just liked showing people his ass.

[–] [email protected] 50 points 1 day ago (4 children)

Was it a nice ass at least?

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago

Who's on first?

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[–] [email protected] 95 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (3 children)

Hentai Gaijin

Also reminds me of this story of a guy who wanted to have his name tattooed in Japanese. His name is Gary. And in Japanese it’s written in Katakana like this ゲリ but Gary didn’t think that looked cool and wanted to have it written in Kanji. So the artist gave him a tattoo of 下痢 which is pronounced as geri. Which actually means diarrhea.

Not sure if it’s true but would be funny as hell if it was.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago

This would be perfect for me and my IBS-D

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 day ago

Geri is my favourite Indonesian crackers, but not so much the chocolate ones...

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[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 day ago

That is actually the same thing.

[–] [email protected] 182 points 2 days ago (2 children)

In high school there was a Chinese girl who hung out with us. We were at at an arcade after school one day, and this guy comes up to her. She's 16. He's 40. He says something like "Hey baby, check this out!"

He takes off his shirt to reveal a not at all impressive body. But his chest had something tattood on it in Chinese.

She goes wide eyed, and runs off. When we caught up to her (obviously without the guy) she's having trouble breathing, because she's giggling so hard. Just try to visualize that. It's not a belly laugh, it's a giggle, but she's giggling so hard she's wheezing.

Now she spoke full perfect english, and only had a slight barely noticable accient. But when we asked her what was so funny, she went full stereotype Chinese voice from how amused she was at the tattoo.

"His chest.....it say ASSHOOOOEEEE!!!" (She was saying asshole, but I typed it phonetically how she said it, and with the enthusiasm she said it).

She just burried her face in her hands, and had the biggest giggle fit I've ever seen. She later said "He must have been an asshole to the tattoo artist. He'll never know!"

[–] [email protected] 49 points 1 day ago

宫保鸡丁

kung pao chicken.

he thought it was super funny, like he was in on the joke.

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