this post was submitted on 09 Aug 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

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If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 8 months ago

Given that's a greentext, legitimately expected anon to somehow get injured or killed by some not paying attention driver on unsafe road or something. Glad he didn't.

[–] [email protected] 136 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (21 children)

> be me

> live in a relatively new part of town in the Netherlands

> bike 20 minutes to the city center

> no hills or mountains because netherlands

> See almost no cars because most bike routes are completely seperated and shorter than car routes

> Park my bike in a surveilled parking area funded by the city

> Do all my shopping for the day and return

> MFW my friends and family don't even realize how good we have it

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 8 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (9 children)

My job is 15 mountainy miles away, and when I show up drenched in bicycle sweat everyone in the office says I smell bad

[–] [email protected] 21 points 8 months ago (6 children)

People shouldn't live that far away from their workplaces. They didn't used to, before we invented shitboxes.

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[–] [email protected] 21 points 8 months ago (3 children)

I do think it's funny that America has the worst traffic in the western world, yet in Europe we can get by just fine with roads built by people that even the Romans considered to be ancient.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 8 months ago

It has to be said that people from one place underestimate the other...

In Europe, 100 miles is a long distance.
In America, 100 years is a long time.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (4 children)

That's because Europeans invest in all forms of transport, so you don't get people who can't fathom the concept of taking any trip from point A to B in anything other than a car.

Edit: not sure why I'm getting downvoted. I think Europe does it way better if that wasn't obvious

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (2 children)

Ngl, I have a nice ass and legs. Nice compliments, too! It's worth it to bike everywhere if your city allows it

I forgot to mention that the cost of repairs is also dirt cheap here.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago (2 children)

I can't bicycle anywhere. Well, at least my commute would be certain death, There is a nice bike trail a few miles away but I'd have buy a bike and a rack for my car to haul it over there. Can barely afford the car.

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 41 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I'll let these babes do the talkin'

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[–] [email protected] 97 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (13 children)

1 gal of gas: ~29k calories - $4.609
~29k calories of rice: ~$600 <-- sus math btw 🤔

It's simple: drink the gas.

 

okay, update:
my math was wrong. new cost of rice: ~$11.5 (ordering in bulk)

CONCLUSION
Drink the gas.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

If you bike regularly, you actually don't spend more calories. You only see calorie burn uptick when first taking on new exercise, which falls off over time back to your usual normal calorie cost. Because of this, that calorie cost for a biker is calorie intake they'd already consume even if they didn't bike. It's essentially free, in contrast to the gas of the car which is always a cost.

Checkmate liberal. /s

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago (4 children)

You can't convince me of free energy

NICE TRY SCIENTOLOGY

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (12 children)

Yeah but I don't have to carry an actual ton of weight on my bike.

Except when I'm taking yo mama home after date night

[–] [email protected] 17 points 8 months ago (1 children)

stfu nerd
My mom has lost a ton of weight and im v proud of her 😡

[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago (3 children)

Okay I'm sorry that was mean

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[–] [email protected] 39 points 8 months ago (1 children)

100 grams of raw white rice is 365 calories, meaning that it's about 3650 calories per kg. 29k calories of rice is 8 kilograms.

Where are you buying rice that it costs $75/kg???

[–] [email protected] 13 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

I did my math wrong lol

Found some at 66c/lb. Need 17.5 lbs. $11.5 👌

[–] [email protected] 30 points 8 months ago (2 children)

If you drink a whole canister of gas, that's enough to cover your nutritional needs for the rest of your life!

[–] [email protected] 13 points 8 months ago
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[–] [email protected] 51 points 8 months ago (1 children)

> be me

> be downtown on bicycle

> actual protected bike lanes

> zipping past hundreds of people that decided to drive for some reason

> bumper to bumper traffic

> road capacity literally maxed out

> honking and yelling at almost every intersection

pic related

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[–] [email protected] 54 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

And park directly in the immediate front of the building I'm visiting. No circling around and around without finding a space to park my overly expensive rust box. Just arrive, lock the bike to a post and be there.

Totally different experience in that aspect alone.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (3 children)

Hm... Is there any law that says I can't ride my bike in the store? 🤔

Sure would make shopping faster.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago

idk about bikes, but I saw some madlads rolling slowly on their electric scooters in shops

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[–] [email protected] 74 points 8 months ago

Actual unironic gigachad moment

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