I heard that he shamed and belittled the couch for not getting pregnant, and said if he ever had the power, he would revoke its right to vote
this post was submitted on 01 Aug 2024
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Showerthoughts
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I heard he even got pegged by a La-Z-Boy
Many fine people are saying it.
Well there were repeated, detailed investigations into the election to gather that evidence.
We just need to give the same amount of scrutiny to the question of whether JD Vance fucks couches. Let's get a senate subcommittee and stuff.
We gotta get the Cyber Ninjas on the case!
yeah but the problem is the red team continued to push dangerous rhetoric to the point that people still don't believe the election was legitimate.
I cannot believe organizations like that are allowed to push blatantly false information that harm everyday people and this nation.
wait, am i an everyday perspn?
are you an everyday person?
what is an everyday person?
Let's lube up a leather couch, put it under a crate propped up with a stick in his Senate office, and once we catch him, see if the trap is filled with little Ottoman Vances.
Okay I feel like I'd be more sympathetic if I knew what kind of couch it is. If it was something like a hideous faux-suede Ashley's sectional, straight to the gas chambers, but if I'm supposed to be shaming this man for a little d’homme à Canapé leather lovin' with an original chrome-spec Le Corbusier, then I won't take part in your witch hunt.
Vagina couch is full of vaginas.
I misjudged Vance. Who could resist that?
No offense but I’d rather stick my dick in a twelve thousand dollar escort instead of a twelve thousand dollar couch.
But can you sit on the escort after making sweet, sweet love to it? Checkmate, athiest
You could, you just have to pay extra for that.
If I paid them twelve thousand bucks I’d better be able to do whatever I want.