There's absolutely no proof that J.D. Vance uses burnt monkey testicles as anal beads while making love to his chaiselongue. Reports of him heating them up in a red Le Creuset cast iron skillet before insertion are pure speculation.
this post was submitted on 27 Jul 2024
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There's also no proof he doesn't though so we can't say for sure
I just hate the fact that this absolute fucker has ruined the name JD. I love Scrubs.
Scrubs ruined the name JD, but he makes it even worse.
Before 2016 I used to use twice impeached, convicted felon ex-president 45's name a lot for context and comparison because it is short and can act as a hard emphasis word.
Not any more and I can't find a verb to replace it but I'll be damned if I give that fascist shitstain even one drop of SEO even on accident
That and the good name of Vance Refrigeration
What kinda business you in Bob?
He’s not an absolute fucker unless absolute is a brand of couch.
It comes with shot-glass-sized cup holders in the armrest.
I wish I'd contented myself with the headline on this one.
Thank you for the comment. I'll let my curiousity go unanswered and my imagination take the reins.
Seems like Trump's people didn't do any digging to vet Vance, but the MAGA crowd will write it all off as fake news anyway.
Now that's it's come out that he got bullied into the JD pick by his failsons, I'm thinking they did do some digging. He just got bullied.
failsons
New word of the day!
Noun
An incompetent, unsuccessful middle-class or upper-class man who is protected from economic duress by his family's wealth or influence.
Also the fact that Trump only cares about himself and his growing cognitive decline means he probably had zero idea who any of the people on "his short list" even were. So when his offspring offered to make that pick for him I'm sure he was all for it, and being a raging narcissist believed it didn't even matter against Biden.
It's sad how old he is. Old and quite weird.
It’s the sequel no one wanted:
Trump term 2
2 old 2 weird
... I just want to stop learning more about this man. Everywhere you look, there's something even more fucked up than whatever you knew before.
(Jk, everyone needs to learn about him so we can win in November)
AmplifyBio should rebrand to AmplifyCruelty.
Also, we're Satan-hybrids now? That's awesome! Coolest thing they've called us yet.
Vance’s investment in Rumble is more on-brand. That company hosts insidious films by anti-vaxxers, who’ve spread the conspiracy theory that Covid is not a respiratory virus, but actually snake venom added to municipal water, and that those pushing mRNA Covid vaccines want to make you “a hybrid of Satan.”
Sign me the fuck up. Do I get demon wings? Pitchfork? It doesn't matter, I'm in dammit
So do we get to pick which Doom-esque demon hybrid we become or is it assigned for us?
I'm thinking it is assigned, but I put in a request anyways
I see here you've requested assignment as a Baron of Hell. Unfortunately, we do not have any of those positions open at this time. I am able to offer you the options of Lost Soul or Generic Zombie. Productive demons will be considered for promotion to Revenant.
I have a lot of experience as a lost soul! 👻
Don't we all though?
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