Nope and yes. I would not personally, but more freedom = good in my book
this post was submitted on 18 Jun 2024
191 points (92.8% liked)
Asklemmy
48264 readers
498 users here now
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
Search asklemmy π
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
- Open-ended question
- Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
- Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
- Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
- An actual topic of discussion
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
- Lemmyverse: community search
- sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
- [email protected]: a community for finding communities
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_[email protected]~
founded 6 years ago
MODERATORS
A little bit more than I was before. These days I will put an arm around or touch a friend on the shoulder or back to show support. I do this with my father too.
My menβs group helped me learn to do this. Itβs really nice.
There are men who havenβt touched another human being in years.
We very much are, hugs and kisses and all. But waaay more important (not everybody is into physical affection on a platonic level) we share our feelings and give each other compliments.
It is very sad to see how many men outside our bubble try to uphold this stupid idea of what it needs to be a man, while struggling with their mental health and the ability to have meaningful relationships.
No, I'm not.
As for social acceptance I like my personal space. Don't care what you do as long as I can opt out.
buddy I'm a furry I'll hug strangers
The guys I go to tantra classes with are very affectionate, and it's so lovely.
I haven't had anything beyond a hug from my mother in 10 years.
A boss of mine some time ago would sneak up and pat me on the back, scaring me most of the time. Back then I hated it.
These days something like that would make my whole week.
Sorta. I'm a comfortable person expressing affection and my inner emotions with friends. I'm also often the one initiating the sharing asking how they are etc, and the physical touch. It's nearly always me initiating, so I'm kinda uncertain how it is in the other person's head. Obv not bad enough to recoil or ask me to stop, but maybe they're just a bit uncomfortable.
Yes. I want it more. I look at relationships among women where that level of physical affection is part of the connection and reinforces it and I want that. I only really have that with my wife and one close friend, who is a woman.
lol
I (from the US) visited my cousins in Italy, and as we were driving around, my cousin and his best friend were joking back and forth in Italian, and it ended with him just kissing his friend on the cheek out of nowhere. It was very cute and entirely non sexual lol. Got a kick out of it since i don't really see that at all in the US.
I kiss my sons and will continue to do so for as long as they let me. I can't think of any other male friends/family that I kiss.
I don't think I'd have a problem with being kissed, but it simply isn't done. Hugs, yes. Kisses, no. I don't feel a need to kiss any of them, which is pretty hypocritical since I readily kiss most of my female friends/family.
Interesting question. I can't say I particularly wish that kissing my male friends/family was more socially normalised. But I'd probably embrace the societal change if it came along.
I really like personal space. I hug my family because we're close and we hug, and I'll hug my closer dawgs if they need it, but most of the time I want people to respect my personal space.
I like hugs... I am ok and like a good hug from anyone. I am just scared to initiate. Hate snuggling or wrestling. Feels weird.
Hugging yes, but with a very limited range of friends, and I don't have much.
I'm okay with a guy initiating a hug, but sometimes it takes me by surprise. But it's a good surprise.
I feel it's acceptable, just doesn't happen often.
Yeah, thatβs become the norm I feel. Plenty of my guy friends are huggers, even when we see each other pretty regularly. But not all of them. Plenty of them are just handshakers, some are dappers (especially after lockdown/covid panic), and a few are just βdonβt touch me.ββ¦-ers.
Hugging yes, "playful" wrestling no. When we wrestle we do it hard and I 8/10 times come home bruised
If I was hard when wrestling I'd start questioning my sexuality
Don't have to question what you already know
Some people naturally get erect during physical exercise. Even things like running and swimming.
Shhhs as true as this is, the joke doesn't work when people start throwing facts about!
Do you wrestle like the ancient Greeks?
Is the implication here that adult women snuggle/wrestle with their friends? Outside of porn videos?
Wrestling, I'm not sure about, but a lot of people platonically snuggle. A lot of it is cultural and also down to your upbringing, but not everyone sees physical affection as something you can only get out of romantic relationships.
My female friends do, so yes
Not necessarily. I've noticed female friends tend to be much more adept at physical affection on the whole. Men tend to have a much wider range, with some hugging you (male) like a 2x4, whereas others shimmy over to you and rest their head or arm around you on a chairlift.
Mostly, I wanted to hear how male-male friends and family treated each other physically, without the complication of SOs or romantic partners fuzzing the responses (since people tend to already be physically affectionate with romantic partners).
It's been really interesting to hear, the responses are much more diverse than I was expecting, and it's really heartwarming to see.
I am bisexual and somewhat poly. With some of my friends I have a more publicly physical/intimate relationship. We may hold hands, hug, or kiss. In private, we cuddle and... do other things as well. I imagine the straights of Lemmy will largely tell you they don't cuddle their male friends while the queer folk will give a different answer.
It's been a much more diverse range of comments than I anticipated. It's very heartening to see. :)
Nope. Nope.
I don't mind a hug, but I have zero desire to snuggle or wrestle with my friends, male or female.
But everyone wants to snuggle squirrels
We're snuggly right up until we get bitey.
That's what I have a cat for
That's when the fun starts
view more: next βΊ