this post was submitted on 15 May 2024
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[–] [email protected] 61 points 6 months ago

I don't know why people don't believe this story. One time my buddy and I raced each other to a local bar and whoever lost had to buy the drinks. Anyway, I'm doing 60 in a 35 MPH zone when I see the flashing lights behind me. I pulled over and gave the cop my story, and wouldn't you believe it the cop escorted me to jail.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

A lot of division over the validity of this. A lot of strife over the "nothingeverhappens"ism of Lemmy. To weigh in on this as objectively as I possibly can, this reads like absolute bullshit, and it's the first time I've seen something so absurdly dumb on Lemmy that I've witnessed mention of people clapping, Albert Einstein, and r/nothingeverhappens.

There are degrees of these things. r/nothingeverhappens exists for people who think a person's story about their toddler saying something really clever is fake, or senselessly believe that some mundane or humorous encounter could not possibly be real.

r/thathappened is for people who claim their father went nearly twice the speed limit, got pulled over by police, told them he was on a race to reach Papa's Pizza, and was promptly forgiven and escorted by them at a dangerous speed to overtake another vehicle and get him there first.

The waters on reddit were muddied a very long time ago.

It's a slippery slope, folks.

[–] [email protected] 47 points 6 months ago (3 children)

That definitely happened, cops don't care about road safety at all

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago

Well, in small rural places where sometimes the sheriff is your cousin and the judge is your uncle, you can get away with a lot.

And I'm speaking from an actual event that occurred to a family member. (They married into that situation)

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I'm confused, it sounded sarcastic but like... Do you think cops care about road safety or not?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (2 children)

Cops don't care about road safety. They're playground bullies with guns who get to terrorise the people who actually passed high school, as long as they protect Capital from protests and uprisings, and keep black people beneath white people in the social order by catching slaves for the prisons.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Glad I asked, I found the story believable for that same reason but wasn't sure if you were sarcastic.

Traffic cops could be a huge help to social order, but nah, rather just be petty tyrants who bring cash into the city via the laziest means of ticketing possible.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

I have a straightforward, no-nonsense approach to politics that convinces people I'm some sort of troll when I say completely reasonable left wing political views. I guess other leftists feel the need to qualify and speak softly and really try hard to make themselves understood by the other side. I don't care about making my views palatable to reactionaries, and I guess for some reason that makes them unpalatable to other leftists as well. It's really fucking weird.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

Such black and white thinking is very rarely accurate.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 6 months ago

When I was in college and delivering pizzas the cops let us speed so long as we "donated" pizzas to the office every Friday. I don't think they care about road safety unless it's time to meet quotas.

[–] [email protected] -2 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

Lot of people in the comment doesn't seem to get it and I feel like explaining it would be too stupid but still - He is not getting an escort the police are chasing him cause he drove away to win the race . Fuck I feel bad explaining this and its gonna bite me in the ass if i didn't understand it correctly and it was sarcasm or something .

[–] [email protected] 21 points 6 months ago

I read it as Dad told the cop why he was going so fast, and cop thought it was funny and decided to help him win. Not totally unrealistic; cops get bored and hate paperwork, and love breaking the law.

[–] [email protected] 80 points 6 months ago (3 children)

Why does no one believe this happened? I've seen lots of stuff like this. In fact I once got a police escort to a Type O Negative concert in an almost similar fashion.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Man, those cops must Love You To Death!

[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Between the Papa's Pizza and the Type O Negative I feel like this thread was made for me personally...

I say this as a man in a Type O shirt with a bottle of Papa's Ranch in my fridge.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Tell me more about your "Papa's Ranch" you like to keep in your fridge.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

It's semen.

[–] [email protected] 67 points 6 months ago

Yeah, it just seems like small town shenanigans to me.

[–] [email protected] 40 points 6 months ago (5 children)

Lemmy, let's not bring over that reddit /r/nothingeverhappens bullshit. If you don't believe it, cool keep it to yourself. Otherwise it's just a funny post, move on.

Been seeing a ton of this nothing ever happens attitude lately

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

How about let people act the way they want? That's not a reddit thing, that's just how regular people respond to an unbelievable story. Sorry your suspension of disbelief is being shattered? If you don't like it, then ignore the people with opposite view points.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Been seeing a ton of this nothing ever happens attitude lately

No you haven't.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I frequent c/GreenText and people have that attitude all the time, including when the post is about the most normal shit you would hear from a boring friend.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 35 points 6 months ago

I'd guess the "nothing ever happens" people are young.

When I was in my early 20s, I met my dad for the first time. He'd tell tall stories I could not believe. Not long after I had a roommate the same age, same tall stories.

Now that I'm that age, I got tall stories. If you choose an adventurous (slightly irresponsible) life, and get off the couch now and again, life is truly stranger than fiction.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago

People are like this also irl. Sure, there was a subreddit for it, but the nothingeverhappens attitude is one of the things i experienced in any country I've been in.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)

That's the most reddit thing i've read in a while

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

A Twitter post? I suppose about 30% of reddit is Twitter posts…

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

Skin color checks out, 10% chance it really happened.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 21 points 6 months ago

And that cop's name? Albert Einstein.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

Mhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

[–] [email protected] 149 points 6 months ago (3 children)

90 in a 55 and gets a police escort. Riiiiight, that totally happened

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

It's like when you're playing Test Drive and you let the cop get ahead of you so that they can act as an autopilot to the next checkpoint.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 41 points 6 months ago

I think being white in a small town is probably enough

[–] [email protected] 182 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Idk... my dad was test driving a Saleen a bit fast and got pulled over. The cop walked up and just said, "Test drive?" Pops said "Yeah," cop goes "follow me."

Took us to this winding road and the two of them bombed it at around a hundred, cop had his lights on the whole time. As a kid, I thought it was pretty cool. Now I think all the adults involved were reckless jackasses, lol.

[–] [email protected] 63 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Still, those are good memories.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 6 months ago

For sure, just one of those moments that you look back and realize how goddamn reckless it all was. It was probably the only time in my life I ever felt sorry for a car salesman. He was new and sweating bullets. The car computer would adjust to the driving to output more power, and he was worried his boss would notice.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 months ago

Improvise. Adapt. Overcome.