Reading the BDSM sections of the bible about stoning the ladies ?
this post was submitted on 02 May 2024
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My wife would be super freaked out and disgusted if I was reading a Bible.
She'd sit down and flip though the naked ladies one though.
Sounds like you two have a great relationship. I'm gonna take a stab in the dark and guess she's bi?
BI BLE
but that says the bibble
You dare question the mighty Jimmy?!
Get down on your friggin knees, right friggin now, and pray with me!
Reminds me of the French giriie picture book' that deputy Loomis kept asking for in the game Harvester.
Tony Zaret, so peak
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Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
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Took me a bit to figure out what BI BLE is. I initially thought it had to do with bisexuality.
The main guy was but some believe he was just gay
Bisexual Bluetooth Low Energy
Not that but rape and slavery for sure.
N*ked Bo
Lady ok
Bi
ble
Fucking love when my wife leaves, and I take my right hand off and enjoy my N*KED LADY BOOK.
Facts
LOL
To be fair, there are naked ladies in the Bible too.
That Song of Solomon is some horny shit.
I love the argument that it’s about the love between god and his followers. Like, nothing against horny deities even ones who fuck their followers, but this interpretation sure does make it sound like the god who demands chastity really wants to fuck you.
It's really contrived, too. This argument comes from people who will tell you that you have to use the whole Bible and not read between the lines. Then they have to struggle to find a reason for Song of Solomon to be there when it's been considered canon for thousands of years.
Can't just use the straightforward conclusion that Solomon was horny.
The man was fucking 1000+ women according to kings. Lol at the idea they need to hide it
Was that the one about them two daughters? I feel so bad for that father. Like couldn't they have found literally anyone else?!
That was Lot fleeing Sodom or Gomorrah or some shit. I mean, if I thought the world was ending and the only person around was my dad, and I was female, goodbye human race okay.
For real, humanity just deservers to die at that point I would figure.
No it's an erotic poem actually. Has lines like "her breasts are like twin gazelles".
Help me out here, I'm having trouble picturing this. Like... a pair of complete, full-size gazelles? Just fastened to the woman's torso? If not, which parts?
I found it! 
That's the quote yeah.
Nice, I'll save that line for my girl 😎
Edit: She didn't get it.
Here is the text. It's actually quite pretty. You don't have to be religious to enjoy it. https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Song%20of%20Solomon%201&version=ESV
Nuked ladies, huh?
Fallout 5: Lady Town
Ooh, I thought nqked.. Doh
Highly irradiated 🙏
🥵🥵☢️☢️
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