To be frank, I definitely did this as tome point and I'm pretty sure I actually did not regret it.
this post was submitted on 06 Jun 2025
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If olives not available substitute cookies, graham crackers, York peppermint patties, or Cheetos.
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Costco sells a big jar of garlic-stuffed green olives and I have to ration my daily intake or I'll destroy the jar in no time
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I have a spit-roast thing that I use to eat from the jar without using my fingers. Very satisfying. I support olives for dinner.
You gotta balance that out with some croutons. Like, a whole bag of croutons.
if i had to pick something to eat 30 or 40 of then olives would be in the top 5
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What if I'm too dysfunctional to buy the olives?
You don't even have to buy them. The jars at the supermarket aren't locked or anything.
Eat them out of a jar with your fingers?
What am I? A beast?
No. Chopsticks. I can eat far, far more olives if I preserve the integrity of my fingers.
Am I the only aspiring tree frog in this thread? Nobody else enjoys putting olives on their fingers and waving menacingly?
This works with Maraschino cherries, also. Helps you reach the bottom of the jar and keeps your fingers from turning red. Double bonus.
Said jar, by the way.
Also like, why are you getting your fingers in brine/ syrup that is going to stay in the jar? Thats gross.
Also, holup.
Are you just straight mackin' Maraschino cherries?
...Yes?
It's the dessert of champions.
Are we talking neon red "cherries" or Luxardo cherries? Cause I can respect one of those.
Neon, of course!
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A while back a dev invited users to test out his app in beta that gave recipe ideas based on your dietary preferences (back before everyone was doing it).
I told it I’m vegetarian, am lactose free (m’spouse is lactose intolerant), and gluten free (I’m not, but 23andMe told me to maybe cut back on gluten to avoid developing the celiac’s I’m at risk for/others in my family have).
The only food it came up with for me— for dinner— was “a handful of almonds.”
That phrase has become a running gag with friends and I whenever we’re hungry af, because I’ll never forget how hilarious of a dinner suggestion that was. It felt akin to my vegetarian experience of going to a stakehouse for my grandpa’s birthday and the waiter being understandably woefully unprepared for my dietary preferences.
Even now some recipe apps— when I look for gluten free stuff— I can tell it didn’t filter my results and instead just appended “gluten free” to ingredients that normally have gluten.
Which I get, but like… gluten free bread is gross/they haven’t mastered that at all.
gluten free bread is gross/they haven’t mastered that at all
Canyon Bakehouse has pretty decent bread, except the loaves grocery stores typically carry are woefully tiny. Like “for ants” tiny.
O’Doughs burger buns are decent, except two things:
- They don’t slice all the way through the bun when precutting, and
- They have poppy seeds on them
As for hotdog buns; well, all brand’s are shit and the people making them should feel really bad for the terrible job they’ve done. Seriously, they should feel nothing but shame.
Canyon is one of the best, but weirdly the Whole Foods store brand is really decent for their bread, waffles, and bagels and super cheap. Like matching normal bread cheap. I go to Whole Foods twice a month and buy pretty much only these items because my wife has Celiacs.
I'm pretty sure that anyone making things labelled 'hotdog buns' instead of rolls isn't paid enough to afford rent, let alone a sense of pride in their work.
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Finally, a real life hack!
Later that day, my anus: "You have betrayed me!"
FIVE CANS?!
CAN YOU?!
I devour the entire pizza and still feel hungry later
When I worked at a fair trade store we had these Palestinian olives that were so damn good. Every morning I'd open a jar for customers to sample, eat olives till I made myself sick, then do it again the next day. Good times.
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if it needs to be green olives, get the stuffed ones. but black olives are fine.
Dinner ✅
I like this.