this post was submitted on 29 May 2025
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[–] [email protected] 48 points 2 days ago (3 children)

I'm always super hesitant to comment on stuff like this because I don't want to be lumped in with the fascists but I'm going to break that rule just this once. When people hear "Male Loneliness Epidemic", it means different things to different people. It appears to me as most left leaning people hear, "I don't have a woman that caters to me and my needs". For myself it means, "I don't have a Support System of friends and family to lean on." A partner would be great but I would get far greater satisfaction in gaining a group of friends or a sense of belonging. Paired with likely Autism and ADHD, things aren't super rad for me on any aspect of life. That's all my own stuff to deal with though.

The takeaway is I hope anyone reading this is doing okay, regardless of gender. I may not get the struggles of your life, but I hope you are overcoming them.

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[–] [email protected] 29 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Yeah you're right, I'm only alone because Im garbage, thanks for that reassurance.

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

not to be sapphic but that type is women

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago

Ya, we see so many lib men drowning in pussy, and hot vapid women in no way voted for this.....

[–] [email protected] 57 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (4 children)

Not even remotely true. Reminder that Trump won white women voters in 2024.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Abuse towards women is unfortunately so normalized by society that I bet most of those women don't realize how much they have been manipulated since childhood to be against their own autonomy, especially if they grew up in a religious environment.

It's possible that women of minority demographics voted more blue because some realized how anti-(their specific minority) republicans are but, just like the white women, weren't put off by republicans' misogyny.

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[–] [email protected] -2 points 2 days ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Trad wives who get off on being told what to do

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 days ago

Those are pink women

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 days ago

He did. But by a smaller margin than he won white men.

So, the shortage of men who aren't nazis is actually there. And I suspect that the nazi women are having little trouble dating.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I am actually going to be reentering the dating game after a little over 10 years. I sometimes wonder 'am i still attractive ' but then I remember this...

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

I'm discovering that it isn't really "am I attractive?" It's " I feel attractive."

Like I'm down 100lbs, been pumping my protein and weights, and I got muscle definition where I've never noticed muscle definition before.

Clothes that fit, glasses I feel comfortable in. I don't really want to "date" because I'm so much happier with impressing myself than trying to impress someone else.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I'm lonely, I wonder what's wrong with me

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[–] [email protected] 29 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Unfortunately there are a lot of similarly awful women, especially in more rural and suburban areas.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 2 days ago (1 children)

True. Never forget that conservative women exist and they can be highly unpleasant.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

And that some of them end up being elected to congress

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 days ago

But you have no meme for that, so how can we believe you?

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[–] [email protected] 63 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Painting all lonely men as douches is kind of fucked up, no?

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[–] [email protected] 47 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

I really feel like this is an idea that needs to die. Plenty of abusive and hateful men seem to have no problems with getting the type of relationships they want; this just inadvertently promotes the idea that one needs to be a 'nice guy' in order to have a relationship. Not every guy who leans left succeeds in wooing a woman, and right wingers complaining about where the women are at are probably in circles with primarily left-leaning women and they need to go look in a church or country concert or something.

[–] [email protected] -2 points 2 days ago

this just inadvertently promotes the idea that one needs to be a ‘nice guy’

I think if anything we have radically fucked up the messaging if we think "not being a nazi" means "being a niceguy."

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 days ago (2 children)

People forget that women can have like, ultraspecific preferences. Women above a certain age tend to be married, the rest not interested in relationships at all. Then there's the Lesbians having relationships with each other. This still does not account for the difficulty dating as a man. I guess most do find a partner, but it's harder, so feels like there's somehow less women available.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

I know a woman who prefers "dad bods"

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

I don’t get it, really. Maybe I’ve just been really lucky.

I have not been single for more than about 5 months since I was 13 (aside from a short window between 18 and 20 when I worked at an office full of people in their 50s and had no contact with anyone my own age). When my ex and I split after about 13 years, I had several flings between that and meeting my wife. I didn’t go looking for them either. I never once made a pass at any woman until she first said something obvious to me. I don’t do subtlety at all.

I’m not attractive, I’m not tall. I haven’t settled and been with anyone I didn’t find attractive or intelligent (only once, directly after the split with my ex, I was a wreck. She was pretty, but dumb as a box of rocks. I was projecting things onto her that weren’t true at all because of the state that I was in).

I am a musician in a small town though, and almost every girl I ever dated was deeply into music and it usually started from there.

It could just be luck, but I really do believe it has everything to do with confidence and being sure of oneself. I have issues, and a lot of them, but I don’t hold back and I never have. The people who don’t like me have an honest reason not to and the people who do don’t have to guess with me.

I have always been unapologetically who I am wherever I go.

I also prefer the company of no one and spend most of my time in isolation and I’ve still had good luck.

I’m getting older now though, and I’m a stay at home dad these days and more isolated than I’ve ever been. I would say that if my wife were to leave me today, I’d be alone for a very long time.

I’m not bragging here either, I’m not about that kind of thing at all. I’m obviously coming from a position of privilege, be it luck or whatever I have going on here that gives me that privilege. I really do think it would be easier for other men though if they’d find confidence and become very passionate about something that women can relate to. My passion for music has definitely, definitely, definitely helped me.

I even spent many years struggling with drug addiction, would not date anyone who had that problem in common with me, and I still found sober women who were willing to tolerate me.

I don’t know. I just hope that if you feel hopelessly alone and you read this comment, it will give you some hope.

Edit:

Don’t just downvote. Discuss it you bitter twat lol. Seriously. I’d like to see your perspective on the matter.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 days ago (1 children)

musician dating people with a shared, social, and popular interest

This is the secret btw.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

It has a lot to do with it, but I’ve only ever been with one fellow musician. None of the other women played music. They just liked music.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

I could wish this where fact, but it fails to take into account that beyond punches you also need social grace and appearances surpassing Ralph Wiggum...

[–] [email protected] 34 points 3 days ago (1 children)

So. Counterpoint to this, in that I think those guys should just keep doing what they’re doing.

The bar is so low all I need to do is show up on a date and not say anything racist and I’m in.

In fact: y’all should go even harder with the douchebaggery.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Agreed, I'm currently living in Trumpistan and all it takes is putting a filter on the dating apps to get interest

Step 1 and Step 2 are real, they just aren't as shallow as the lonely dudes think they are.

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