this post was submitted on 15 May 2025
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Not The Onion

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

This why I stay away from astrology girls.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

Well it technically did, only due to the fact he had an absolute idiot wife.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

Honey, how about a nice hot cup of Minority Report?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 days ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

The guy didn't lose anything. He will found someone better.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago

Yep I am sure he will fund someone on onlyfans to fill the gap.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 days ago

The guy didn't lose anything. He will fund someone better.

Not sure if typo, or cynicism.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 days ago

It seems that the woman has a penchant for believing mystical guidance. "A few years ago, she visited an astrologer and it took a whole year for her to accept that none of it was real," the husband said.

That should've been the first clue. I can date someone who engages in fantasy for a bit, but if they never come back to reality then just put the relationship down humanely.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 days ago (1 children)

This is about as psychotic as governments using AI to predict crimes.

[–] [email protected] 38 points 2 days ago (1 children)

My ex-wife used tarot cards to justify cheating on me, and then leaving me.

I didn't even know she had tarot cards.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 days ago (1 children)

It is amazing what excuses cheaters will use to justify their behavior.

In my case, my ex did the nature documentary argument way before the manosphere became a thing. I dunno why that is a pattern with that sort of man. They like to think of themselves as superior intellectuals until it comes to sex, then they will make graphs and studies and be pseudo David Attenboroughs to justify that their caveman urges are too strong for them to overcome.

I guess the female version of that is tarot cards, coffee grounds and zodiacs? I hope you found a better lady later, because that one surely wasn't worth keeping in your life!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Well, it's probably true. Their urges are too strong for them to overcome. But that's what an adult should be able to do, overcome the fucking urges

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

Exactly. But cheaters love pretending their urges are mystical forces, not a failure to act like grown-ups. Funny how that "strength" vanishes when accountability's involved.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago
[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

Sure, it can't count how many Rs are in strawberry, but it definitely for sure can predict future affairs in bean stew ingredients. /s

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

can predict future affairs in bean stew ingredients.

Ain't nothing more refreshing than adding some coffee grounds to your bean stew

[–] [email protected] 46 points 3 days ago

Good for him.

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