This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.
Be warned:
If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.
Well first of all anon is a pillock for paying $100 for a haircut. Any Barber actually charging that amount would have at least given him some hair gel or something.
I pay about 10% of that and it comes out looking fine. Then again, my haircut is designed to make my hair look less stupid, and it's not intended to me me look like a football hooligan.
I pay half of it. The Hispanic barbershop charges $25 and I always pay 40-50. Now my hair looks great.
He can become a youtuber with that haircut
I swear someone needs to teach young men about pomade, hair gel, mousse, just anything at all about how to style and texture your hair. I guarantee the guy in the left pic doesn't look like that when he rolls out of bed, and if you want your hair to look like his, you'll need similar amounts of styling and product.
You're not at all wrong with the first part.
But I can tell you with hair like that, you can actually just roll out of bed and have it look good. But that presupposes you've actually taken care of the hair and that it's cut well.
Definitely wasn't a great stylist if that's how unevenly they cut the front, but also that dudes hair is kinda dry, so perhaps with product he could make it look better.
I had horrible problems with a frizzy mess of hair until started using a leave in conditioner spray and a bit of hair oil. I also sleep with a silk bonnet. But yeah, when there's a suitable amount of both, the next day I'll just wake up and slightly brush it and it looks great. Whereas last year I couldn't even get a brush through it. And if I don't wear the bonnet I don't need to brush even, as it squishes the hair a bit.
If I style it I use a tiny bit pomade, but like a really soft one. Almost like a cream.
But yeah you're definitely right that someone should teach men about hair care. I'm still just learning but my hair is already much better. Just would've enjoyed knowing these things in my 20's for a gorgeous mane. I don't have male pattern baldness in my family really but it does thin a bit.
i thought i was doomed to always have bad hair aside from maybe one or two days a month when they decided to look nice
gels never worked, neither did pomades (curly hair) but then i discovered hair modelling clay, and now i can have a nice hair whenever i want :)
Yes, clay for curly hair! My stylist introduced me to that and now I realize it’s half the battle. L’Oréal shit I use is expensive at $23, but it lasts awhile and the results lead to regular compliments.
Same issue, pomade was the fix for me (wavy hair), until then I always just lived with my hair looking like shit until it reached the perfect balance of "unwashed enough to have some weight and texture on it, clean or dry shampooed enough to not look super unwashed".
Yeah, the barber should have told you that cut doesn't match your bone structure.
You muh-muh-make me hu-hu-happy.
TBD the first photo is a dumbass haircut too, it’s just on someone with good bone structure
The beard is also doing a lot of work.
Pretty sure it's a profile mug shot as well.
The problem is entirely you. The fact you want a "chad" haircut is the problem. It's probably for the best the biggest incel echo chamber is gone.
Chad is pretty much common parlance now, it's use hasn't been a good metric of incellibecy in at least two years
I don't think I've ever met anyone normal who refers to themselves as Chad. They aways come of as needy and trying to prove something.
It really hasn't. If all the people you're associating with are using Chad and Stacy in regular conversation, you need to expand your pool of friends.
Comb it up and back, with gel if necessary
That's not a chad haircut, that's the basic slavic haircut
Implying that basic Slavs aren't Chad as fuck.
You spent $100 to look like that?
The sound of hoof beats cross the glade!
Good folk, lock up your son and daughter!
Beware the deadly flashing blade,
unless you want to end up shorter!
Black Adder! Black Adder! He rides a pitch black steed!
Black Adder! Black Adder! He's very bad indeed!
Black - his gloves of finest mole.
Black - his codpiece made of metal.
His horse is blacker than a vole.
his pot is blacker than his kettle.
Black Adder! Black Adder! With many a cunning plan!
Black Adder! Black Adder! You horrid little man!
Best
Well, if you want a Hitler Youth cut, you deserve to look like an idiot.
It's an incredibly basic bitch middle-eastern man cut. Every immigrant in Sweden has those fade sides, with a mop on top. They brought barber-culture and it has become incredibly popular.
People usually get them at a barber, not at the hairdresser, which is where OP made his mistake.
Why would you cry because of haircut? Sometimes I am unsatisfied when I leave barbershop, but it's not like anyone cares about my haircut, lol.
In other words, just shave it off, and move on.
If I paid $100 for a haircut I'd be crying too
How about you actually put some product like wax or gel in your hair so you can style it properly?
I can't believe I had to scroll this far down to see this.
Because it wouldn't help. That cut makes him look like an 18th century nun. I bet the barber used a bowl
It would, he has fine hair and no matter what length or how it was cut it's not going to look great without some product to give texture for a crop type cut.
100% his hair wasn’t long enough to begin with and the stylist told him so and he still went ahead. Also what’s chad about that? It’s a chav haircut and chavs are like the opposite of chad.
Confidence makes the Chad, not the haircut.