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A collection of some classic Lemmy memes for your enjoyment
Yeah, I try not to let things go unsaid myself because I don't really post memes much and I do try to fight against the toxic mentality of "men don't share feelings" shit.
But I feel a sort of mental "sting" every time I talk about something that makes me sad in front of people. It makes me worry I'm being pathetic, unlikable, or unattractive.
It's very true trueeeee
And then kill themselves
Source CDC
Estrogen is anti psychotic and has various benefits for the brain. Schizophrenia manifests mainly after menopause in women and during peak testosterone age in men
Wasn't the attempted suicide rate for men and women the same (not completely sure), but men overall tended to opt in for more 'successful' methods making the actual suicide rate higher?
Women attempt more, but use ineffective strategies like overdose. Men attempt less, but use more effective strategies than women do (like half of successful attempts are with guns. It’s actually really hard to OD on purpose - tried it at least three times lol)
It’s not a “men have it better than women” or vice versa thing. It’s more about cultural presentations of suicide and suicidality.
Hey guys guess where I will do a backflip tonight lmao 🤣
If only this were an actual meme
Nah, i tell my bois all about it and they talk to me about it.
That's nice. I'm trying to get there myself. It's hard enough to be honest with yourself, let alone your buds.
It is hard on both accounts, yes.
And also: it's okay to accept people who don't want a deeper relationship. You can have different friendships at different levels.
No shit. Men, nor women, pretend to be sad, they pretend to be happy.
Well what else are we supposed to do? Open up about our problems and get ridiculed to oblivion?
Good for you, I wish I had those kinds of friends
What am I supposed to do? "Oh, hey, yeah, so, I just held my cat in my arms as he died. I had to euthanize him because he was had congestive heart failure, and was slowly drowning from pulmonary edema. I miss him so much, and I want to believe that he's in a better place, but he's just dead and gone, and I'm never gonna see him again. All I've got are memories, and they're going to fade with time until one day I realize that I haven't thought about him in years. But yo, how are you doin'? Any big plans for the weekend?"
You get up, and keep doing the shit you have to do, because it needs to get done. Telling people you're really depressed tends to make them feel really awkward, they don't know what to say, and then they gradually start ghosting you. Shit sucks, but you put a happy face on because no one wants to know that you aren't happy.
It is tough, but emotionally mature people will know how to react. Even if all they say is something like "damn man, I'm really sorry to hear that." Or if they're extra cool (I don't know anyone like this irl) they might even ask if there's anything they can do. Maybe come by for a visit and chat. That kind of thing.
You can simply say "yo I'm sad about my cat's death". Accept your feelings and dont be shy to share them, just dont impose them. It also opens buds to help you if they're up for it.
Shutting them up only reinforces this idea that men dont cry and arent allowed to feel things, and the day you need actual help people will mock and leave you for being a downer and a weakling.
Friendships are built on the ups and the downs.
Also in this case, you need to let yourself grieve, or itll pop up in the future when you dont expect it to.
It also opens buds to help you if they’re up for it.
My experience has been that being emotionally open tends to make people withdraw. Should it be that way? Of course not. Should I get better friends? Yeah, that would be cool, and I wish that was as easy to do as it is to say. I've found that many relationships and friendships end up being somewhat transactional; people are there for the good times, but aren't interested in the emotional labor when shit gets real. I try to be there for people when they're going through shit, but that doesn't seem to be reciprocated.
If I sound bitter, well, I am. And cynical.
A lot of people I had thought were friends ghosted me when I failed to complete suicide and had a 72 hour hold. My ex-spouse held me in utter contempt because I was struggling emotionally. A lot of people I had known for a decade or more ghosted me when my ex-spouse and I were getting divorced; in fact, I only got to keep one friend in that divorce.
I suspect that this is part of the experience of being on the autism spectrum.
Yeah it depends on who you do it with. Part of emotional intelligence is knowing what the limits others have is, but if you're unable to even state that you are going to be in a bad mood then that's less than a friendship.
As for the suicide attempt, that's something incredibly heavy for anyone. I don't completely blame them, but at the same time, you'd expect something, not full on ghosting. It's like they're the ones who commited suicide, sheesh.
And lastly about the spectrum... It makes you think that people are rational, logical, that they will keep in mind the trades you've done and will pay you back eventually. The truth is: People are irrational shits.
As for the suicide attempt, that’s something incredibly heavy for anyone.
The irony is that some of the people I had mistakenly believed were friends were (are, I believe) in an anti-suicide advocacy group. I guess it was easier for them to say the right things than to do the right things. 🤷 Lessons learned, etc.
Mate, come join us at the @[email protected] group on Mastodon. There are a lot of fellow autists who will be there to lend an ear if you need to vent or need some practical advice. I recommend the autistics.life instance. I have the same issue irl, people will expect me to be there when they need me, but now that I need someone on my side, they'll happily throw me under the bus. You're not alone, even if it's just a few randos online.
Man that is a raw deal. I worry about my friend circle if my partner ever left me. I suck at making friends, so most of the people I know now are through her.
My experience has been that being emotionally open tends to make people withdraw.
Yeah, that sounds sadly typical for guys. I wonder where the cool emotionally available people all are?
I wonder where the cool emotionally available people all are?
I met some when I was a member of The Satanic Temple. And then Lucien Greaves/Doug Mesner went full-on authoritarian, I bailed because I'd already escaped from one cult, and the people I knew stayed. Now I'm the out-group, rather than a friend, because group/social identity is harder to let go of than individual friendships. I met some when I was in art school; hopefully the world hasn't beaten that tendency out of them yet.
I suck at making friends
I hear you. It's hard to make plans with anyone now; no one seems to follow through. And without spending time with people, you can't build those bonds of friendship.
Memes ARE a cope