this post was submitted on 12 Apr 2025
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Microblog Memes

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago

Yeah they don't put him in the uniform anymore lol

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago

it's what believers crave! it's got electrolytes!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago

You got me to laugh, updoot

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

You can literally do it with spit.... And that's not a hypothetical. You can do it with any fluid if necessary... How is this controversial?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago

Because not all dogma can be easily explained or defended so it is easier to hunt the messenger. Compare to evangelicals and how much they roar against some things in the old covenant as sins while still using cloth made of mixed materials, eat bacon or refuse to kill their kids if they are not respectful enough.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago

There is nothing in consumption Ra has forbidden Yu-gi-ok for the masses and movie theatres and coitus are the devil.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Idiocracy 2, where the dumbest priest ever is sent into the future to save Catholicism.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago

Someone get Mike Judge on the phone

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago

Sippin on the haterade as usual.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago

wow they weren't kidding about civ7

[–] [email protected] 30 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (2 children)

I mean, I'm not a theologist or anything, but based on other precedents, if someone was dying and wanted to be baptized at the last second, and no source of water could be arranged on time, the Gatorade baptism would probably be accepted by the Catholic church.

Transubstantiation of Gatorade into Holy Water doesn't even sound that outrageous when priests claim to transubstantiate wine to blood on a daily basis.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

This seems to mean that priests can theoretically make any liquid holy, thereby making holy Gatorade.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago

Uh, skeet skeet "enjoy salvation"

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago

They've got holy water and holy wine. Why not holy beer.

"This is my piss, drink of it and be holy"

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I just checked and it seems that unfortunately not. At least catholic Priests are only allowed to bless "true water", which is usually understood to mean that nothing was purposely added to it (with the exception of certain salts for rituals like exorcism).

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

So is tap water okay, or only where it isn't fluoridated? What about sea water ? Heavy water ? Rain water ?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago

It needs to be demineralized and deionized to be able to accept god and become holy. God is quite picky

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Bartender: "Sorry, dude, you've had quite a few drinks, I have to cut you off, only water for you from now on."

Jesus: "Dammit... "

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago

Sam and Dean using Holy Church flavoured Gatorade to defeat evil, then drinking the rest to recover their lost electrolytes...

[–] [email protected] 31 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

I legit thought it was going to say it found some way to molest a kid

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago

Somehow, I imagine it similar to this

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 weeks ago

That usually results in promotion

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 weeks ago

Drink of the Riptide Rush, and be healed!

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