this post was submitted on 11 Mar 2025
649 points (95.8% liked)

Programmer Humor

23404 readers
1711 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

transcriptA meme saying: "STOP DOING COMPUTER SCIENCE"

  • Computers were supposed to solve math, NOT to be programmed
  • C is a LETTER, not a language
  • Wanna print() something? Write it in a PAPER with a PEN
  • "I'm writing a recursive method with threads to optimize the CPU usage in a 0.02%" THIS IS A NONSENSICAL STATEMENT MADE BY DERANGED PEOPLE

Look at what PROGRAMMERs have been demanding your respect for, after all the led lights we put in their computers: (This is real COMPUTER SCIENCE, done by real COMPUTER SCIENTISTS)

  • FUNNY COLORED LETTERS (with a picture of syntax-highlighted code)
  • 178 COMPILATION ERRORS????? (with a picture of compilation errors
  • A FAKE TEAPOT YOU CAN'T USE (with a picture of a 3d rendered teapot.

IF PROGRAMMING WAS REAL HOW COME NOBODY THOUGH IN DOING while(true{print(money);}

end transcript.

(page 2) 19 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] SlopppyEngineer@lemmy.world 49 points 2 months ago (1 children)

A client with s very low budget wanted a solution for their filing. We suggested they could get more bang for their bucks with preprinted paper forms, pens and a cabinet than going for software. They were not amused.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Mothproof2212@feddit.org 68 points 2 months ago (4 children)

Why are you trying to write python? Just get one from the pet shop!

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] nullPointer@programming.dev 42 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

I just tell people that I am a "professional button pusher"

[–] Irelephant@lemm.ee 33 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Knowing which buttons to push is the valuable part though.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] someguy3@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago (6 children)
[–] Tja@programming.dev 3 points 2 months ago (2 children)

It's a device to brew tea in.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] MaggiWuerze@feddit.org 21 points 2 months ago

Its a traditional shape you try to recreate in algorithmic 3d graphics

[–] doeknius_gloek@discuss.tchncs.de 21 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] hakunawazo@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

I'm a t... I'm BATMAN.

[–] charonn0@startrek.website 17 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

A standard reference model in 3d modeling.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Utah_teapot

[–] thickertoofan@lemm.ee 12 points 2 months ago

Yeah it's all propaganda, I like bashing a keyboard's keys due to sexual reasons.

[–] BillTheTailor@lemmy.ml 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Developer here: can confirm. (#4 is actually true.)

[–] xmunk@sh.itjust.works 9 points 2 months ago (5 children)

Indeed, anytime I optimize code, it ends up taking more CPU to run.

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] A_A@lemmy.world 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)

:) + Bitcoin mining :
while(true{print(money);}

[–] Tja@programming.dev 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

There's like 2 syntax errors in this one liner.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Gork@lemm.ee 16 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (3 children)

We need more funding for RGB lit components for our programmers since this will make them better programmers

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] Kidplayer_666@lemm.ee 9 points 2 months ago

Weimar Republic thought of exactly that

load more comments