this post was submitted on 20 Dec 2024
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Kind of a follow up from my question from a few days ago, for me just depresses me and usually I'm working or worried about stuff anyways so I don't know how to enjoy festivities, plus being eternally alone without a partner makes things even sadder. Xmas is more of a post it of how much my life has failed.

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago

To me it's essentially just the time we all ("we all" as in my friends and family) agree to set aside for each other. We'll make a fuss over spending time together, and the specifics of why it's at that time of year or why we call it Christmas or anything else don't matter so much to us. Most of us aren't Christians anyway.

The new year is arguably a bigger event in my area, but to be honest it's all just kind of the festive season. Do as little work as you can manage, see the people you like to see. That's what it's about.

If you don't have anyone that you would like to spend it with, you're perfectly allowed to cook yourself something nice, take the day easy, settle in with a good movie, some snacks, and something good to drink if you like alcohol. I normally spend Christmas with my family, but the one year when circumstances did compel me to spend it alone I did this and I had a lovely day.

Maybe if you feel up for it and want to get involved somehow, you could do some volunteering on the day - at least in my personal experience, it tends to be pretty easy going and have a pleasant atmosphere, and you can feel good about what you've done with the time too. Most places need a bit of help during Christmas, because the normal crew's schedules will be a bit off kilter. I've done a good few Christmas mornings.

If you are Christian, maybe you can engage with the religious side of it. Churches obviously have special services on the day, and they're usually the busiest of the year too. This is obviously only useful if you do follow some kind of Christianity or at least have some interest, but if you do fall into one of those groups then don't let nerves or a lack of other attendance stop you.

If you're not religious but live in a Christian (or culturally Christian-influenced) area, you can maybe even take advantage of the fact that everyone is busy. My Jewish ex and her family have a tradition of going out for Chinese food on Christmas day. Everything else is closed anyway, and the Jewish and Chinese communities are the largest non-Christian groups in their area, so they'd go to each other's businesses for the day

And at the end of the day, if what you personally feel you need most is to ignore it and make it as normal a day as possible, that's totally fine.