Menards, world renowned for selling the wettest possible lumber.
this post was submitted on 02 Oct 2024
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I used to be a male prostitute, but I couldn't make a living at it because people always saved big money at Menards.
Stupid pimp.
So the ship's wheel that he had attached to his crotch didn't provide adequate protection?
He removed it. It was driving him nuts
This whole thing made me remember those old Menard's ads that would end with the old guy drawing a circle with his jaw while saying "menAAAAAARRRRRRRDSSS!!!"
Save Big Money
When you shop Menards!
Jokes aside I like the rebate program.
Normal people walking past and shaking their damn heads as I am somehow in a fight with a pirate…
My brother in law calls it the "whore store"...because you can get anything you want there.
The owner is a piece of shit
You can't just tell us some rich bastard is a piece of shit and expect us to believe you! It's so rare and unlikely!
Me: nards
Ope, I’m suddenly reminded of my midwesterness
You tryna save big money?
Did you know that you can save 11% on EVERYTHING?
I literally bought the soft toy bear that sings the jingle. I'm surprised they haven't expanded toward the coasts, I never even considered going to Lowes or Home Depot when I lived relatively nearby one. I was initially not a fan because they put the local True Value out of business but the selection and prices are just too good at Menards with much more silly charm. And the 11% rebates were amazing if you remembered to actually mail them in.
I always read it like a leprechaun. What did the leprechaun say when it got kicked in the nuts? “OCH, ME’NARDS!”
Watch out for that 11% rebate
Edit: sometimes I forget that Menards is a Midwest thing. Their big advertising thing is that you can mail your receipt to receive 11% of the bill back
This is to deprive yourself of the ability to return what you bought?
Probably, but it's a hardware store. I don't know about the habits of folks outside of my little corner of the Midwest, but very few people return things to them anyways
I rebate me hook when the fish gets away. Yarr