this post was submitted on 20 Aug 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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(page 3) 37 comments
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[–] [email protected] 44 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I learned to dab while sneezing back when the meme wasn't dead yet. I got so used to it, that I do that to this day. At least my palms are clean

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago

Three toots is enemy action.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 194 points 2 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 39 points 2 months ago

I love how the last full paragraph shifts the narrative from tooting in general is strange to normalizing 2 toots, but a 3rd one???

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago (2 children)

This is so fake. Are we supposed to believe that the boss can predict when a fart is going to be extra nasty and adding an extra toot when he ALWAYS only does two???

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[–] [email protected] 38 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I had a manager once who had 3 small kids and he rarely caught himself when he excused himself from a meeting to “go potty”.

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago

Record that shit, and watch the internet roast him

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago (3 children)

He has Tourette's.

You are now on HR's "list" to be fired over something petty and inconsequential.

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[–] [email protected] 208 points 2 months ago (2 children)

The story doesn't make sense. He only ever does two, three would be ridiculous.

[–] [email protected] 38 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I'm gonna start a rumor that there's a different boss in a different division that does four.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 months ago (1 children)

This is a shitpost? This boss is my spirit animal.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 months ago (1 children)

More of a shart post at best

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago

Thanks to the third toot.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You are officially at war, beans are your friend

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[–] [email protected] 106 points 2 months ago

It's impacting my morale and performance

I can't think of a funnier sentence if I tried

[–] [email protected] 108 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Wasn't someone saying "toot toot" and farting a part of Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide? Lol

[–] [email protected] 78 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (4 children)
[–] [email protected] 36 points 2 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 months ago

Confirmed, OOPs boss is Timmy Toot Toot as an adult lmfao

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

What is up with that title

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago

Don't worry about it. Just don't message soap members. Ok?

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[–] [email protected] 52 points 2 months ago (2 children)

toot. toot. toot. TOOOOOT

and that's how the universe got created kids

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 months ago

And on the fourth toot, God evacuated the heaven and the earth.

[–] [email protected] 231 points 2 months ago (2 children)

You unlock legendary at 4 toots.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 2 months ago (3 children)

The forth one is always a shart.

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[–] [email protected] 140 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Only 0.04% of employees have this

[–] [email protected] 26 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Is there a strategy guide online for this trophy?

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago

gotta kiss a lot of ass to get that promotion

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[–] [email protected] 68 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Straight up Beetlejuiced a nasty fart into existence.

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