!egg_irl is for widely relatable memes about questioning one's gender or being an egg (a trans person in denial) as well as other eggy topics.
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[CW: Assumes Viewer is Transmasc][CW: Assumes Viewer is Transfem][CW: Assumes Viewer is Nonbinary][CW: Transphobia][CW: Violence][CW: Weapons/Firearms][CW: Disturbing Imagery]You may optionally include other tags, such as:
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Sorry, nope. Do not want.
Specifically, do not want the following:
Do want (but does not in any way make up for above):
Girls can wear cargo pants...
Me too, I agree. Except with the birth part.
Same. I also like being stronger.
Don't forget to put "fruity scents" in the pro column. Women/girls get all the great smelling perfumes, body scents, soaps. Still rather be a boy because of all the negatives though
I want to be treated like a girl in certain situations. But I'm keeping my cock n balls. 😤
Plenty of girls do tho
I mean, I really don't. I'm not particularly gung-ho about being male, but I don't think I'd be happier as a girl because my problems stem from socioeconomic stresses, rather than anything to do with my gender perception or body image.
How did you all figure this out for yourself? I mean, what made it click?
Define "figure out." I figured out I disliked being male by considering what I liked and disliked about myself. All the positives were more feminine or neutral, while all the negatives were masculine or masc coded. I decided on NB, but it still felt off. I didn't want to be considered male, but I didn't know if I wanted to be female.
For years I couldn't parse my feelings when I imagined myself as a woman. I felt better, but I struggle with even identifying emotions, so it wasn't clear enough to convince me. Eventually, I imagined myself as a mother: being pregnant, giving birth, raising a child that was my own. It felt so euphoric that I broke down crying because I knew I could never go back.
I still took another 5-6 months to start the process of coming out. I was still uncertain and terrified when I finally took the leap of faith. I was on death's door mental health wise. I realized I could not carry on any longer as a man, yet it still took so much effort to make the best decision I've ever made.
It was night and day. I never thought I could be so happy or love life like that. It's a miracle that I made it 23 years feeling like I wasn't alive.
Thanks for sharing. I think maybe my dysphoria isn't as strong. I guess I'd gravitate more towards being non binary than fully identifying with being a man/woman (what does it even mean). But I'm not sure, I feel physically fine in my body, but I guess I'm still questioning a lot of things.
WillStealYourUsername has already given a very good overview, to add to that...
It is a highly individual process and while many trans people share certain experiences, no two trans people will have exactly the same kind of journey.
While the public perception of trans people is very much focused on the rather rare cases of young children who will insist on being trans from an early age on. While these cases definitely exist, far more trans people are going through a gradual process of realization. There may be a final "egg crack" (the moment of final realization), but it is usually preceded by a slow process of smaller realizations and it is nowhere near a linear process...
As WillStealYourUsername describes so well, in hindsight all the signs and individual quirks make sense, but most people have to attain a certain level of self-acceptance before being able to recognize the various symptoms for what they are.
In my personal case, it was an intense jealousy of fem people that would never go away and culminated in a moment where I had an emotional meltdown over a fictional character who transitioned from male to female in their storyline. That's when I finally realized that I could do the same thing if I got my shit together and accepted being trans.
I knew something was up when a friend came out to me and I realised it was possible to be something other than your assigned gender.
5 years later, I'm reading an article about a non-binary person and bam, it all made sense.
I wish I could have learned about nonbinary identity much earlier. Like back when I was having a crisis about my gender in high school I only knew the full binary MtF and FtM existed. But whenever I thought about it being a girl felt just as wrong as being a boy to me. Just for different reasons. No matter how hard I tried I couldn't reconcile not wanting to be a boy, periodically wishing I had been born a girl, but not actually wanting to be a girl.
Wasn't until about 12 years later at like 26 when I met my now wife and she told me all that sounded like nonbinary and I suddenly had things to Google. I wish I could have had a chance to actually transition before fully growing into being 6'2" and built like a fridge in a fursuit. But like now I'm 33, I had other medical issues that I didn't want to try piling a potential transition on top of, and I'm not even sure what realistic transition goals I could even have let alone have a chance of attaining.
I can absolutely sympathise, I've got a bunch of medical issues and only began my transition journey recently, well past puberty. It's the best thing I've ever done, the only goal I'd say you should ever have for your transition, is to be happy.
Also, it's useful to keep in mind that there are many ways of affirming your gender other than medical stuff, though I'll admit the medical transition has been the best for me.
I kinda have the opposite experience of gender, I feel equally comfortable as being boy and girl though generally prefer a mix at most times. It's so cool to me how differently we can experience these sorts of things
I wish I had the social support of girls and their close friends.
Otherwise, nah. Always liked who and what I am. But much love and good wishes to those who don't.
I mean that should be pretty obvious. Why would you want to have an oily face? Why would anyone want to look like a rectangle and look like an ogre? For real tho, who?
EDIT: changed likw to like (written in italic 🇮🇹🥖🥐)
I had quite a few friends who were girls who struggled with all of those things, that's not a healthy view of womanhood
What exactly do you mean? The properties I described were supposed to be directed at the masculine characteristics I don't like. Did you perhaps mean that some of these are not masc-exclusive?
Women and men both can have masculine features. I think they are saying that masculine features aren't a male thing exclusively and arent inherently negative.
That's a fair point. I personally just thought that most masc stuff is very uncomfortable.
The problem is, it depends who you ask. For me, I dont really have anyone pushing the idea of male and female stuff growing up, sort of like an atheist household might not talk about religion much.
I'm not saying that trans stuff isnt real, but it does seem like its to a degree a reaction to societies treatment of a person.
Why resemble a yeti when you could have TITS!? Amongst many other quality of life changes
I genuinely thought this was true in middle school and got confused when my friends didn't want that (it was still true for me though I'm totally cis you can tell by the way I am)
Yeah, I was pretty much convinced of the same thing while still in school: How could my class mates not want to change their gender? It's the most amazing thing in the world to do! Who would say no to that?
If it was temporary then sure why not for a day or a week. As a permanent decision with the current level of technology, I don't see the point at all.
not necessarily for you but for other trans people reading - transition isn't going to make you cis but it can help a lot of things. at the very least, hormones can potentially provide a lot of mental benefits, even if you won't get the exact body you want at the end of the day
and, y'know, if they don't, you can always stop taking them