Looks. Never liked the face, I always look tired or otherwise scary. I'm absolutely blessed to have a preference in living my own life, I can't imagine trying dating or anything.
this post was submitted on 04 Jun 2024
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I have imposter syndrome in life. I constantly feel like having to behave in a way I’m not. I’m often times scared in the public in fear of embarrassment or whatever. Certain scenarios already make me freak out in my head before they even have a chance to occur. I keep on not … living … enjoying life. always fearsome of bad things to happen in the future, not giving myself time and room to grieve. My last relationship took my belief that everything is going to be fine, and I was kinda bitter before that already.
I also have imposters at work esp. because I don’t have any degree whatsoever to prove that I know what I am doing, but since it’s worked out for a couple of years that is kind of the least worry most of the time.
My singleness. I know the problem is me but I can't seem to be the person people want.
Maybe it's not that you can't be what someone else wants, but that you aren't finding or building relationships with the people that would want you. There are so many people with such vasts tastes, that there is someone for everyone, even serial killers or 40 year olds that dress in diapers. Whatever you are, there are people that are looking for that. It's a matter of finding and building a relationship with them. ♥️
Being overly secure can be a problem too... I'm quite secure, because I've gone out of my way to work on insecurities. Buuut this has the consequence of insecure people seeing me as arrogant 🤷
'The woods would be very silent if no birds sang except those who sang the best.'
I don't have a girlfriend (because I can't get one) when everyone around me is in a relationship.
do women approach you or flirt with you?
Unfortunately no. If it was the opposite, I wouldn't be in this situation.
So when I was dating a while back I was apparently fuckin terrible at picking up hints. the ladies were dropping hints but my insecurities had brainwashed me into not seeing them. It was embarrassingly bad on my part.
One thing I had to learn was that if I asked someone out and they said no or didn't reciprocate wasn't a loss or rejection. You're in the same space and you can move on.
One thing I had to learn was that if I asked someone out and they said no or didn't reciprocate wasn't a loss or rejection.
Not only that, but you dodged a bullet. I thank women when they respectfully reject me. It's awesome.
Also, think about all the times you were turned down. Does any of that matter now?? Nope. No one involved cares at all if they even remember. I think something that might help with this is for OP to place themselves in a position where they reject others. They could experience the other side and see that it's not a bad thing. It's just that they think it's not for them and nothing else. And even in the rare chance that the rejection is seen as something else by the rejecting person, then even better because that's not just dodging a bullet but dodging an artillery shell.
I get called judgemental all the time. I have on idea why. I don't judge anyone. And yet.... they judge me as judgemental.
It drives me nuts. I think it's just my face and the fact I don't smile constantly. It also makes socializing very difficult, because I only tend to get along with very secure chill folks... which there aren't many of in the world. I often have people blow up at me for 'being mean to them' even though I have said nothing to them and didn't even notice them.
You've heard of resting bitch face. I have angry dad voice. I always sound like I'm barking orders.
I've had some people call me judgemental because I'm seeing them do something wrong/failing at something and I'm trying to show them how to do it right. A lot of people get very defensive about being taught how to do something.
I leave people alone because I want to be left alone.
Yeah, but others may not see it that way because they are analyzing your actions through their thought process.
Random thought: find some YouTubers who have Autism, watch a few videos, and see if you can strongly relate. If you do relate, it might be something worth exploring.
Yeah, that's it. I'm clearly autistic. Even though I have zero symptoms of autism or ADHD and have been tested for it and had low markers... just like the ordinary average person does.
It was simply a suggestion given that my neurodivergent friends have similar experiences. It's good that you ruled it out though.
That some people are irreparably broken and I’m one of them.
a lot of people just refuse to fix their shit and take responsibility for their actions. you don't have to be one of them
That's not what they mean. People who think they are broken will have been dealt a bad hand in life and our society's fundamental statute of "treat everyone the same by being equally shitty to everyone" means the same shit hits harder for the people with the bad hand and when they see other people with a better hand managing to deal with it they start to think that something is wrong with them.
That or a basic preconception of who/what/where they should be in life that they find themselves either not achieving or veering away from. It's that old "be a man" bullshit with a very strict view of what a "man" is and not enough wiggle room to accommodate who they really are.
The mean life is life? Everyone deals with that.
Every single person agonizing about what is 'wrong' with them. Why people don't 'like' them. etc. Esp very popular, attractive, and successful people. They agonize about it a lot more than you.
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