No Stupid Questions

pulls rip cord

Pots, pans and other kitchen utensils cartoonishly fly out

Right, the question definitely sounds incredible silly when you put it like that haha, but fair point. Was more thinking it would be better that some survived than none, but indeed: on a full passanger airplane this would probably never work out.

People can barely get off or on a stationary plane in an orderly fashion.

There would be people climbing over one another and seats, people getting trampled, Stooging at the doors, people getting knocked out of the door without a parachute, and people falling to their death because they didn't put the parachute on right or they exceeded the weight limits of the equipment due to their American figure.

In other words (and more neutrally), there have not been any randomized controlled trials of parachute intervention, so we do not have data to say whether they would work or not.

this is satire/trolling, not an answer.

It works for the Cirrus because that plane is tiny. A parachute big enough to safely land a commercial jet is not feasible.

If a commercial plane has a failure, say an engine failure as in the news story, the pilots with fly the plane with the other engine to a safe landing.

If the Cirrus has an engine failure it becomes a glider. If there's no airports nearby you'll have to ditch in a field somewhere. There is a lot less redundancy in general aviation.

If you're a new pilot buying your first plane, having a parachute on the plane is a nice feature.

Hahaha I didn't think the odds for the life vest execution would be so bad, and that's way more simple than a parachute.

lol I watched this like yesterday

I'm in your head 😈

Short answers from the video: (but its a good video if you have the time)

1. They weigh a huge amount and take up a lot of space, so carrying them on every flight would be crazy expensive for extra fuel cost and reduce other baggage cargo that could be carried.
2. Current day passengers have difficulty just putting and keeping a simple seat belt on. Properly putting on a parachute, especially in the small space you have in an airliner, and successfully deploying it outside are beyond what airline passengers are capable of doing.
3. Passenger jets fly too high and too fast to survive jumping out of one at cursing altitude. Even if you successfully put on the parachute, got out of the plane without being sucking into an engine or hitting a control surface at 400MPH, you would quickly suffocate from lack of oxygen and/or freeze to death from the sub zero temperatures at that altitude.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nick_Piantanida

This guy was in a remote controlled, parachute equipped gondola at 17km altitude wearing a pressurized suite. His suit broke and even though the emergency descent of the gondola was immediately activated to descend safely, he later died from embolism (bubbles forming in the blood because of rapidly decreasing pressure). Passenger jets cruise at about 11km so i gather it would be similar.

Plus a lot of flights are above ocean or rough terrain a lot of the time, limiting the possibilities even more.

Commercial airlines also fly really high up. If you were ejected at cruising altitude, the first thing you would do is pass out and fall for a few minutes. Hopefully you wake up in time to orient yourself and activate a parachute.

Ah, yeah this makes total sense actually. Thanks for the insight!