Well, people don't like posers or wearing a shirt just because of a trend. Those hardcore fans can be toxic. Never seen an iron maiden fan do that though.
Watching stolen valor videos on YouTube is fun to watch thou. Especially those who are truly committing it. People just wearing a camo jacket for style or even pants are a bit overboard.
Reminds me of a scene from the Deer Hunter.
ITT the guy in the meme gatekeeps women's day-to-day experience with men
"name five of their songs" questions person A's (the one wearing the band t-shirt) knowledge of the band.
"name five women who trust you" questions person B's (the one who asked the 1st question) relationships with women in their life.
therefore "name five women who trust you" is much more loaded than "name five of their songs", making it a response that is, perhaps, too rude and unnecessary. although, assuming person B asked person A to name the songs unprompted (this is probably what usually happens), this could be an appropriate counter-question as sometimes a ruder response is necessary when dealing with annoying people.
People who have only just met me typically ask if I have kids (even though they rarely ask my husband the same question). And when I say that I don't, 80% of those people think that "Why not?" is an appropriate follow-up. And about half of them will go on about how having kids is great and I should really do it and that someday I'll change my mind.
Now, I made a choice not to have kids. It's not a difficult subject for me, even though it's annoying to have strangers insinuate that I don't know myself well enough to make that decision. But I have several loved ones who have suffered miscarriages and fertility issues, and I know that they feel really uncomfortable answering that question.
So right around the time I turned 35, my standard response became, " You know, when a woman gets to be a certain age and she doesn't have kids, there's usually a reason, and she usually doesn't want to discuss it with strangers."
That usually stops those people in their tracks. And I hope it has stopped at least one of them from asking a really invasive question to a person who's overly sensitive about the fact that they can't have kids.
All that to say that humoring someone and naming the five songs (or saying that you can't) out of politeness just reiterates that they were correct to act as a gatekeeper. Pointing out how rude the question is might actually change their behavior in the future.
To be fair, you actually don't know if you'd be happier with kids since you don't, you know, have any kids.
And now imagine you do have kids and actually know that you were happier before ....
Thats a bummer. You should get out of there, kids can tell when a parent doesnt want them.
Don't worry, this was just hypothetical. I actually love my kids.
I approve this emotional roller coaster, it had a good ending!
And I hope it has stopped at least one of them from asking a really invasive question to a person who’s overly sensitive about the fact that they can’t have kids.
For having this mindset, you deserve all the good things in life
Its always fucking unprompted
I had it happen once with Eluveitie. Fuck me for not remembering song names in ancient Gaulish I guess.
My sister was wearing a Harry Potter shirt and, in a grocery store, got confronted by some random girl that got super excited about it, and she showed my sister her tattoo of the Deathly Hallows. My sister had no idea what it was cause she never read the books and didn't finish the movies, but she enjoys the shirt cause our mom loves the Harry Potter universe. The girl got all sorts of upset and threw some judgy looks at her. My sister doesn't wear the shirt anymore.
Post just reminded me of that story, not trying to make a point or anything, just want to join in on the discussion.
Inb4 anti-JK Rowling commentary, you'd be preaching to the choir.
This is why people should either left harmless stranger alone or ask politely before assuming something about said stranger.
Idk, I'm fine with strangers engaging with others in public. We're missing a genuine sense of community. I do feel that with more of this type of engagement, people won't be so awkward when it goes in an unexpected route and maybe we'll develop more kindness for one another.
I have been known to be too optimistic, though.
This site is a good reference point to see if I'm still a normal person. If I find myself agreeing too much with the takes and memes here then that means that I've become out of touch and I need to go outside and touch grass for awhile. So far so good.
What site? Lemmy in general or this community?
Which takes? In the OP or the comments?
Lemmy.world for sure.