this post was submitted on 05 May 2025
651 points (98.5% liked)

Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] [email protected] 43 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I mean the odds of her having daddy issues were over 90%

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

And the odds of her never having pondered her father except for this one time when she was working: 0%

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 days ago

Me on Lemmy NSFW every day.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago

“These aren’t the daddies you’re looking for”

[–] [email protected] 90 points 3 days ago (4 children)

Fake: Dinosurs aren't real

Gay: Wants to talk about dinosaurs instead of porn

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 days ago

Plot twist: anon is a scaly furry

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago

More like Ace

[–] [email protected] 51 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I’m mostly hung up on the fact that he just happened to have an account for a cam site with tokens already funded and ready to go. Something tells me this wasn’t his first time.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

Not only was it wild he coincidentally had the account ready, it's equally wild that this girl never thought about her father before this random stranger brings it up while she's trying to work. Really wild stuff, almost makes you wonder.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I don't think he ever said it's his first time

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago

Not explicitly, no

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 days ago (1 children)

wait thats gay? am i gay? oh no

what about other extinct groups of animals, like pterosaurs? is wanting to talk about those gay too?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 days ago (1 children)

What do you mean other extinct groups? That implies dinosaurs are extinct.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

i always forget birds exist, sorry

edit: and i also forgot about the whole state of Acre, Brazil

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Wait, what happens in Acre?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

It's an landlocked equivalent to the Bermuda Triangle

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

it is heard around all of Brazil that there are dinosaurs in Acre, but nobody has ever been there to truly know

[–] [email protected] 105 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Don't worry Anon, she was just prepping her Stegosaurus cosplay outfit with multiple dildo plating.

[–] [email protected] 45 points 3 days ago (4 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago

Oh my.. Thank you for the correct term, I'm sure she's been thagomized to the Cretaceous and back by now.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago

dildo thagomizer!

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 days ago

Thagomizer? I hardly know her!