this post was submitted on 21 Apr 2025
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I didn't think he would really do it.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago

If he had anything to do with it he probably heated the discussion and yelled at him like a spoiled brat.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago
  • Just
  • Die
  • Vatican
  • Asshole
  • Now
  • Cum
  • Expeditiously
[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 day ago

JD Vance was the thing that made the Pope finally give up on humanity.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

It's a joke.

A rather bad joke, imho. I think "when they go low, we go high" is a good ideal. ... however you want to interpret that phrase.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 day ago

He killed the pope then a couple days later started up a Muslim terror attack on Hindus so all the worlds major religions are at war

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 day ago

One thing I've learned is never try to beat a couch fucker at his own game

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Homie has a problem with decency and people following the word of Jesus, despite publicly saying he is a Christian.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

not just christian. catholic.

in any other age, any other pope, he'd have been excommunicated and maybe put to the auto de fe.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 day ago

The pope didn’t thank him

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 day ago

the vatican couch was plush

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Obviously Vance wanted to fuck the Papal seat. The pope tried to explain that he couldn't just let Vance fuck the chair of St Peter. Vance did not like this answer.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

He slew two white whales in the same building!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

If JD Vance was actually the antichrist/satan it's super funny we greeted his arrival by calling him a couch fucker.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

I wonder what couch fucker is in Latin... might make a great shirt

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I asked ChatGPT to explain why JD Vance would kill the pope and it cited articles at me to tell me that JD Vance did not, in fact, kill the pope. I even tried to get it to doubt itself and it doubled down. If I have to live in slop world, I should at least be able to have fun with it :(

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago

Interesting, no slop against big brother.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 day ago

He probably didn't even do it on purpose. But I'm sure he did it.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 day ago

Obviously he was hoping to take his powers.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 day ago

Rearrange the letters in J.D. Vance and you get VADJECAN

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago

Probably sitting on a couch he found really attractive and got jealous.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 days ago (2 children)

The Pope had this really hot couch and JD fell in love with it at first sight. JD asked the couches father (the Pope) for the couches hand in marriage. The Pope, thinking this was a strange joke, laughed at JD's request. This filled JD with rage so he slit the popes thoat and began fucking the hot sofa.

As he bled out the pope was forced to watch the repeated violent defloration of his favorite piece of furniture.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago

The couch is just him being gay and thiel forcing him to put it in his book as a humiliation ritual

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 days ago

I mean I don't think I know Vance killed him. See Trump can make stuff up why can't we.

[–] [email protected] 52 points 2 days ago (1 children)

He killed him by being near him

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 day ago

Remind some of this

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Vance is pure evil. Pure evil needs to feed to sustain. In the face of pure evil the pope lost all hope and then Vance fed upon his soul.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago

There's photo evidence thanks to AI

[–] [email protected] 25 points 2 days ago

I love how this is thread is basically lemmyshitpost lmao

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