this post was submitted on 04 Jan 2025
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Comic Strips

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[–] [email protected] 55 points 2 months ago (6 children)

Boss makes a dollar, I make a penny, that's why I'm drunk on "Jack" and Henny.

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[–] [email protected] 37 points 2 months ago

Wait, I was supposed to record how often I jerk it when I was in the office? Because I may have underreported. 💁

[–] [email protected] 75 points 2 months ago (11 children)

Having a % increase associated with masturbation (vs undefined/infinite) means that there was a non-0 number of office masturbations prior to remote work.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago
[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 months ago

I don't think that's impossible

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 2 months ago
[–] [email protected] 154 points 2 months ago (1 children)

If only bosses actually cared about productivity and free employee satisfaction.

[–] [email protected] 105 points 2 months ago (4 children)

It has nothing to do with productivity. When you have a lease for 20 years on very expensive downtown property and a whole department that manages that property and sr stakeholders that have investments in the commercial real estate. Then it all makes sense.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It’s called going dark. Most businesses don’t own their property. So if they stop operating at a location, even if they still pay rent, there are consequences.

Say you own a strip mall with a grocery store. A selling point to getting restaurants and retail on around it is that the grocery is there. If the grocery store stops doing business there, all the other stores lose business.

I don’t agree with it, but that’s how it is.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 months ago (4 children)

I'm not sure your example tracks as there'd be no reason for a grocery store to pay rent without occupying the space. In this analogy, it would need to be some sort of office which would have some tangential effect on surrounding businesses (like restaurants), but those restaurants could just relocate to where the people are now in their homes.

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[–] [email protected] 49 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Also they tend to be control freaks.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

I know me, I'm a control freak

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