I've just stripped and primed 6 kitchen drawers. They need 2 coats of paint after that. I have to silicone around the new bath panel later on and maybe make a start at replacing the curtain rails. The old rails and baton need to come down, new wood cut, finished, routed, painted then afixed to the wall. It'll look good when done, but I'm not looking forward to it.
this post was submitted on 03 Oct 2024
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Nice. I tore out my weird rotten cabinets last spring..my plan is to try my hand at building custom cabinets here. I know it will probably cost me more in time and frustration and possibly even materials and tools than ordering some, but it's something I want to try.
I got rear ended and I think I may have a concussion.
My finances are so tight right now. I’m at an ER right now, because everyone I know says to get any symptoms documented ASAP.
Rear ended at a stop light two nights ago (Thursday). Tried to work last night (Uber driver), but whereas I usually do 4-5 hours before a break no problem, I could only go about 1 hour before being too exhausted and feeling my attention slip.
I really, really need to make money this weekend. I hope there’s some kind of lost wages support I can get, because I’m afraid if I drive (a) I could be unsafe and/or (b) I could prevent my brain from recovering by not resting enough.
I don’t have any buffer to cover me for now, even if I’m awarded some kind of lost wages judgment later. I’m worried, overwhelmed. Don’t know what to do.
On top of this, my nephew who’s in a rough spot in life just showed up in town unannounced. He didn’t ask, but I offered to let him stay with me. He’s homeless. He says his plan was to just stay on the street or at a shelter.
He’s a good kid, but he’s a total spaz. He found some gig work today, but he botched getting up on time and I woke myself up early to drive him to this job.
I really, really need my sleep. When I wake up there’s like a 30 second window for me to go back to sleep. But I rolled out of bed and drove him to the job site. Because he didn’t plan well enough for getting there.
I grilled him the whole way on how he can avoid making that mistake in the future. His answers were vague at first. He literally just said “discipline” when I asked how he can avoid this in the future. I was like “no, I’m asking what specific steps you can take to avoid this”.
He’s got a seizure disorder. He’s in and out of mental hospitals. He’s been on the street in Oregon. Got OR gov’t to provide him a train ticket to Denver.
I feel for him, but I really really need solitude and rest if I’m gonna recover from a concussion.
Fuck.
He’s got really bad adhd. I keep finding food he took out of fridge then just forgot.
I’m in my 40s, he’s in his 20s. This is my first apartment ever. I’m struggling to survive. Living week to week doing uber with a rented car. But the shelters are full as far as I’ve heard. Meaning he’d be on the literal street.
I’m praying. My own father is helping me out.
The fucking timing on this is crazy. Was heading to the train station to meet him, stopped at a red light, when the other car just ran into mine. Like, just sitting there then bam, my world is changed.
Nephew is weirdly childlike. He’s turning 30 this year, but he talks like a teenager. Thinks like one. I find myself naturally fathering him, like “Did you remember your coat?”. Shit like that.
When I lived on the street it made me grow up. I don’t understand how it hasn’t made him grow up. Or if I’m mistaking mental illness for childishness (as others have done with me).
I’m sitting in an ER waiting room right now. Staff giving me dirty looks like I’m a drug seeker. Don’t know what the fuck I’m gonna do.
My own father, in his late 70s, is offering to lend me a little money to get through this. I’ve got shame issues around accepting that. Trying not to let the shame control me.
I might just tell the nephew that he’s got to go out for the next four or five days. Figure out other housing or sleep on the street. I simply cannot rest my mind unless I’m alone. It took me until my fucking 40s to secure an apartment that was mine, where I could be alone. Then when I really need the solitude, in order to let my neurons relax and recover from the fogginess of this concussion, is literally the same day (out of the approx 15,000 days of my life) that my nephew drops out of the ether needing help.
I don’t even know what kind of help I need. I guess I need clarity and courage. Clarity to know exactly what I need to do, and the courage to do it.
I think the right move is:
- Accept the loan from Dad
- Kick Nephew to the curb (at least for a week while I recover)
But I feel no certainty about that. It feels wrong. My mind and my heart are out of alignment.
Your dad loves you and wants you to do well... Honor that by letting him help you out.
Regarding your nephew, it sounds highly likely that your house is not his final stop in life. If you don't have the capacity to take him in there's no sense in letting his one homelessness become two homelessnesses. You can support him in other ways, maybe as a role model and a mentor, but if he needs a parent you might not be it. Parents grow into that role alongside their infants.
Do you have any interest in doing something other than Uber, or doing Uber just on the side?
I'm replacing my master brake cylinder and booster in my truck. It'll be the first time working on a car I actually own. Never done this in a GMC but i was told by a friend its easy(probably not). Was gonna have a shop do it but they are gonna charge me as much as I pay in rent.
Did you do it?
Not yet. I got the parts and I need to get a line wrench. Maybe a friend to help with the brake bleeding.
My daughter is taking a nap, and my wife is out for most of the day coaching soccer. Things are peaceful now, but when my daughter wakes up, I have to do the grocery shopping for the week and start meal prepping. Not sure if you guys have dealt with a toddler in a super market, but it's a nightmare. Then I have to figure out how I am going to get the groceries up to my 3rd floor walk up apartment while wrangling my daughter. I can't just leave her in my apartment while I make trips because toddlers are basically constantly trying to kill themselves, and it's my job to make sure that doesn't happen. Then I have to start meal prepping with a toddler in my care. This is another set of challenges. I could wait until my wife gets home, but then I'm shopping late and won't be able to cook until tomorrow. And if I have to cook all day tomorrow, then we don't get to go on a family bike ride, and this time of year is so perfect for bike riding. I could order the groceries online, but they always fuck it up and then I end up having to go to the store anyway.
This might not be as big as some of the other problems people are having today, but man, I could really just use another set of hands to help me through today's responsibilities.
Try and change how you feel about it. Instead of your daughter being an impediment to your chore, instead, you get to spend some quality time with her. Treat it like a daddy/daughter outing to look forward to. Stop and get yourselves a small treat so you're not hangry. Talk to her as you shop. Let her make a few small choices. Does she want carrot sticks or pepper strips for snack, white or orange cheese, red or green apples? Have her check things off your list, or just a pretend one, depending on her age.
Keeping her involved will keep her from being as much trouble and keep her entertained for longer. And you get to make nice memories with her instead of being annoyed.
And if things break down, grab the most important things first, and you can order the rest and try another day.
It actually ended up being great! She was very patient in the store and was super happy letting me hand stuff to her so she could put it in the cart. She wanted to help and she loved doing it! She was asking a lot of "what's that?" for everything in the store, and I got to explain to her what different things were and how I would use them in a recepie. It did indeed end up being a fun daddy/daughter day, and my wife was pulling up just as I got back to our apartment so she was able to help out with carrying the groceries. Then I was able to get some meal prepping done while my wife kept an eye on our daughter. We even were able to squeeze in a trip to the fall carnival in the evening and I got to take my daughter down the Super Slide for the first time. She absolutely loved it.
So now I'm exhausted, but all in all 10/10 day, would do it again.
How about getting the groceries delivered? Lots of stores have delivery service.
You can give a good tip for them running the groceries up the stairs for you. If there’s a special instruction field you can say something like:
Sorry for the stairs. I have a toddler up here I can’t leave. I’ll tip you $20 for the hassle of bringing the bags upstairs.
I've got 2 bush cords to stack....
I could use some help with the metric shit ton of chicken biryani I made a couple of days ago.
That sounds delicious, was there a certain recipe you used?
This one: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6XlMguO9r-M
There's a few ingredients missing from the recipe he puts in the comments so watch the video closely if you're going to try it.
Also 1kg of dried rice - I measured out that amount and yes, it's the same as he uses but it's just way too much.
Damnit that's a great problem to have! 🤤
Not today, but recently at work, I, a DevOps engineer specializing in Linux and other Unix/Unix-like systems, was given the task of doing some admin and maintenance work on a few Windows servers...
I FUCKING HATE WINDOWS
THIS OS MAKES NO SENSE AND ADMINISTERING IT IS A NIGHTMARE
FUCK MICROSOFT!
I used to work in IT.
Having to make promises about things with so many uncertain variables was really bad for my mental health.
Don’t forget about ChatGPT, which is pretty good about giving (mostly accurate) answers to tech questions.
What's your task? I've supported quite a few systems
Upgrading/reinstalling some company specific software (it's an absolute mess, we essentially build our own tools for everything in C++, there's probably a quadrillion memory vulnerabilities and the software crashes all the time), because random people on the Windows team have been tinkering with the config over the years, and now essentially everything is broken and has to be reinstalled. We have been shipping newer versions of our software to customers than we were running internally... (of course it was tested in the staging environment, but our prod was pretty unmaintained and messy) I'm so glad that I'm usually on the Linux team... I was a software engineer before, but I was tired of C++ and the weird way we do things, so I was probably the first one who asked to move to the newly formed Linux team, when we started slowly migrating away from Windows around 6 or 7 years ago. Unfortunately like half of the Windows team recently quit or was laid off, so they had to find someone who could do this. Since I was a dev before, I'm quite familiar with our internal tools. I'm now working with 3 Windows guys on fixing this insanity. The entire process is not quite as bad as it sounds, but I really don't want to touch a Windows system ever again in my life.
Sorry to hear that, it originally sounded like I might be able to help with some scripts but cleaning up the org is definitely going to be work. Stay strong
it originally sounded like I might be able to help with some scripts
Thanks man, I still appreciate it a lot
I feel like I just need to clarify some things. In my initial comment, I was bashing Microsoft, not because it's their fault that my company has such a messy environment and workflows, but because the way Windows Server works is just stupid. Since there's no proper shell (PowerShell is absolute garbage), everyone on the Windows team uses fucking RDP to log in to the server... Most of the stuff can't be reasonably done through a CLI, and requires using the stupid GUI wizards. Configurations can't be replicated as easily, since I can't just use scp to copy a config file, I actually need to go through the stupid GUI wizard again. Active Directory is a huge mess that's been held together by hopes and prayers over the past few decades, and I hope it dies sooner rather than later. Also fuck my company's stupid decisions from 20 years ago... Integrating some stupid Windows/Microsoft specific stuff into all of our products was not the best idea, and they realized this a few years ago. Now we have a huge amount of technical debt though, and it will take decades to get everything ported over.
Preach! I got onboarded to a team with 31 other SRES and 2 weeks in I realized that I was doing all their jobs in Linux solo. The things got helped my team before I got there: octopus deploy's "run script on host" it's not too different from invoke command -computername "", but Active directory :vomit: and security locked down most of the useful tools, so they used octo runbooks instead (also vomit but you do get tools back in the remote UI) but it's setup with tentacles w/ identifiable ssh keys so it skips ad. It also lets you set env variable libraries.
Move configs to dev repos and make them set/read their own yaml/json, for some reason windows shops didn't get that memo. Royal TSX is a decent rdp client that you can script host lists and store prod/dev credentials, ours is basically just knife node list | sort windirstat is a GUI replacement for du - *. The light at the end of the tunnel is when you drop the codebase in a windows container and just remove all of the iis mess/instability for container management.
Right now we are trying to figure out bootstrapping. In order to provision a new host we need to reboot the box 2x for ad and one for the app stack. We think we can remove the hostname assignment, but AD shakes fist... it's kinda pointless targeting an automated step, when it needs manual intervention later anyways.
i drank too much last night and now i feel a bit too sick. I live alone so cleanup and cooking are a bit challenging
Take vitamin b complex and drink something with electrolytes. (It's what plants crave) (Kidding about the Idiocracy joke, do it). Source: recovering alcoholic
I brute forced myself into cleaning up and cooking healthier meals for myself. It sucks, but if you rinse your dishes right after you eat and put leftovers away instead of "letting them cool" or "soaking the dishes", everything gets so much easier.
If you want a really tasty, filling cheap fall dish that will 100% help a hangover:
Throw some evoo and garlic into a pan and let it go for like a minute. Then throw in a handful of fresh spinach. Then a handful of halved cherry tomatoes. Then two cans of drained cannelloni white beans. Then a cup of heavy cream and a half cup of Parmesan cheese. Salt, pepper and toast some bread.
Buying all the ingredients at once is like maybe $15 and this stuff can be used for anything. I've made breakfast sandwiches with these beans, a fried egg, and some Sriracha on an English muffin.
Crap!
Don't forget to load in tons of water. Be patient with yourself today. Only do what you have to until you're feeling better.
I hope tomorrow is a fresh start for you!
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