this post was submitted on 12 Sep 2024
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Programmer Humor

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

The text message representation of having a phone call and going through a tunnel mid sentence.

[–] [email protected] 52 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Jesus Christ that's Elon's kid !!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago

I am so glad I wasn’t drinking something when I read that.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

Jia Tan is at it again!

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 week ago

White? That’s an ethnic name.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

… and the offender is an 8-year-old even-whiter female who was found in the forest graveyard several years ago with no discernible parents.

[–] [email protected] 59 points 1 week ago

Looks like the kidnapper also stole the null terminator for this string!

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 week ago
[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 week ago (3 children)

I honestly wish all alerts were able to be turned off (including national bullshit)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

Use adb, I've seen Canadian turn off all alarms using adb

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Yeah if where’s the thrill if you’re just gonna be notified of nukes & nados like a wuss

Also personally, prefer a 0.00% chance of finding a wandering elderly person or abducted kid to 0.00001%

(If either feature were frequently abused that would change my calculus, or maybe if I had severe anxiety(?) or a critical sleep schedule or something)

Edit: I mean this more lightheartedly than it sounds

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago

if you're going to get nuked there's little that can be done, missing people are too common because many areas of the US do them on a county level leading to messages about missing people that are from more than 50 miles away. Probably part of why I hate them is that during a poorly coordenated school lockdown the national alert test happened and it terrified just about everyone in the school as every phone (even the silenced ones) blasted alarms while the teachers didn't know if the drill was a drill.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Search for "emergency" in your settings, I can apparently turn them all off (though I've never received one anyway)

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I finally went in and did this a couple weeks ago. We were under flash flood advisory and every time the end timestamp was updated, we got another "severe" alert. I didn't need 8 very loud alerts going off over the course of a quiet evening at home.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago (2 children)

If a flash flood had actually devastated your area, do you think you'd have the same stance on the alert

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

I was just as alert after the first 3 alerts as after the 8th. The additional alerts didn't tell me anything new, they just gave me alarm fatigue.

And yes, it was bad. Roads were flooded. Buildings were flooded. People were evacuated. People died.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

there are generally actual alerts systems (that don't depend on expensive dodads) in areas prone to flooding.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

Everywhere is prone to flooding if water is coming down hard enough for long enough.

[–] [email protected] 125 points 1 week ago

Another of Elon Musk's kids?

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 week ago

Abducted by aliens!

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I just imagined a horrible alternative universe where it's illegal for brand names to become corrupted regardless of whatever else happens to data. Eventually humanity would start communicating only in brand names to ensure messages get through. *shudder*

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago

Writing prompt right here

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

That Boes Audio so EAGames that I would Disney+ myself.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

Just Do It ✅

[–] [email protected] 125 points 1 week ago (3 children)

oh no! Not Johnny drop tables!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

More like Johnny; drop tables

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago

Juanito Greco, el destruidor de tabelas

[–] [email protected] 57 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Is Johnny the brother of little Bobby Tables?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 week ago

Terry Truncate Table

[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Never heard if him ¯\(ツ)