I think I'll just piss myself and never get out of bed again.
this post was submitted on 06 Sep 2024
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Thats me everytime I forgot to unload my washing machine.
Why not both? "But how?!", I hear you say. With a magical device known as a catheter, of course! Simply insert the receiving tube into your urethra and then go to sleep knowing you won't wake up in a puddle of your own leavings.
I also prefer sounding before bed!
😂
That’s me at 4 am trying to fight the urge and go back to sleep, knowing full well my body woke me up cause I had to pee.
Get older, get comfortable, falling asleep and remember you forgot to pee.
Wake up now and go pee?
Or
Fall asleep knowing you'll wake up at 3 am having to pee really bad?
My asshole body: yeah I know you peed before bed but it's 2 hours before you need to be awake so you need to pee now. Oh the time you went to bed changed and the time you need to be up changed? Doesn't matter, 2 hours before you need to be up I'll wake you up to pee. Good luck getting back to sleep!
Pee a little, let it dry, pee a little, let it dry...
Listen, we can't all have the bladder control of a perfectly sculpted Greek God - ok?
Just roll over lift the bllanket a little, and pee into the kiddie pool you keep next to your bed for late night peeing, and early morning foot baths, don't people know it prevents athletes foot?
Horrible day to have eyes
All those things sleep experts tell you to do in order to fall asleep faster and sleep more soundly? Pee should be ~~at the top~~ in the middle of the list, right before the part where you get ensconced under the covers.
Edit: if you get up for a crying baby, pee again before you go. It might go back to sleep, but mostly, once you pick it up you'll not get another chance to pee, maybe for hours.
Thank God for the emoji. I wasn't sure how to react to this image
Am I supposed to cry screaming?
...you become 12?
Always go pee. Yes, it's annoying as hell to crawl out of the comfy bed again. But it's even more annoying to wake up a couple hours later with an even fuller bladder - or even worse, to wake up with an emptier bladder.
I've often risked it. So far haven't had the accident happen. Can't be arsed to go every time since it takes me a while to fall back asleep if I get up
Am I the only one who ends up peeing in the dream, only to wake up with a wet bed?
No, that is not a joke, despite how disgusting it sounds.
Edit: nevermind, the reply thread right above me mentioned that someone else might've done this.
My sister had a pad thst goes under her sheets that when it got wet it rang an alarm and she had to chart the piss puddle.
She hasn't wet the bed for 50 years.
I heard theodd1sout talk about this at some point.
I had to learn to remember this within the dream and to forcibly wake myself up from it to stop this happening. Which I think is quite an accomplishment, if I may say so myself.
I suspect it goes back to wearing nappies/diapers as a baby. Babies naturally try to wait until they are unclothed to relieve themselves; they essentially have to learn how to go in a nappy, or else let it happen because they can't hold it in any longer. Then they have unlearn this with potty training. It's crazy really.
Crazy indeed.
It's common enough when younger. It stops in teenage years to middle age, then starts again in old age.
Do some kegels to firm up that pelvic floor. Drink less water before bed. If you can, remember pissing in dream means pissing in bed. Wake yourself up before you mark the sheets like every drunk lush of a woman I've slept with.
drunk lush of a woman
I am certainly not here to be all like MEN DO IT TOO but I felt the need to drop an anecdote about a lead singer in a band I toured with once. He only drank black label beer, no liquor. He blacked out every night and pissed all the beds he met lol
like every drink lush of woman
Is this aneurysm posting?
Is this aneurysm posting?
Phone spellcheck blows now lol. Tanks.
I'll take that advice into consideration.
This guy pees.
Sometimes on the toilet, sometimes in his bed. Everything in moderation.
lol this only gets worse. just wait until you're over 40
We all know we fight it for quite some time before eventually relenting, then wonder why we didn't relent hours earlier.
Hours?? It is just minutes of thinking for me
Counterpoint: sleep and pee. You think you are better than mice? Pssh.
The question is not whether to do one or the other, but rather the sequence of tasks.
If I go there will be trouble.
If I stay it will be double.
It's the white man in Hammersmith Palais