this post was submitted on 05 Sep 2024
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It wouldn't be such a tired cliché if Americans were not insisting on ownership of "football" without the qualification "American". Nobody makes fun of Australian rules football, Canadian football or Gaelic football, because they don't claim the generic term football to the exclusion of what the vast majority of the world calls football.
Brilliant!
The football is one foot long. The European equivalent would be a meterball.
Official NFL Football Dimensions:
Length: 11.5 inches (29 cm)
So it's not even a foot, and it's not even a ball..
How far is 11.5 inches away from a foot? Since I don't know what a foot is apparently, can you tell me how far off I was? Is .5 inches a lot? I can't tell. I guess people don't round for convenience? I can't believe I was so off. 11.5 out of 12? Might as well be 1.5.
That's- that's an arm.
Handegg or armegg. Both are equally close to being as suitable for the sport as football.
Handeggery with ads.
Feet ball is where the footjobs really happen.
I'll give you handegg but the other one looks more like groundball
I spend thousand of dollars per year on American Football games and I would be totally down with hand egg branding.
It is still a ball.
It's Hand Ball.
And Handball, well really that's a FUTure sport. We'll call it...Futball!
Yes, and horse racing is called "fast glue." I'd post the old 4chan pic of them all but some are kinda offensive.
What sort of eggs are that shape? And why have they never been introduced to the Lilliputians?
I'd be ok with throwy melon
"Handegg is kinda sexy, NGL."
--Easter Bunny
I actually really like the name Egghand
And ball foot easily rolls off the tongue
There are conflicting explanations of the origin of the word "football". It is widely assumed that the word "football" (or the phrase "foot ball") refers to the action of the foot kicking a ball. There is an alternative explanation, which is that football originally referred to a variety of games in medieval Europe that were played on foot. There is no conclusive evidence for either explanation.
That's so convoluted even NASA boffins that ARE able to correctly convert from imperial to metric and land things on Mars got confused.
What an original joke
The guy in the second picture is an NFL quarterback. They get paid a LOT of money to play this game, which makes this his job!
By your logic, he's using his hands to perform his job. I guess that makes it a hand job.
There aren't any rugs used in rugby, either.
And "cricket?" They would be crushed instantly.
I don't see any keys in hockey either.
Don't even get me started on bowling.
Let's talk about bad-mint-on.
Softball? It ain't soft!
Wow, I never considered this before, like, ever
(yes, that's sarcasm, this "joke" is so tired)
You're poking fun at Americans with this, but the origin of the term is British - both for American Gridiron and Soccer.
Americans making up all kinds of weird shit just to justify their handegg in between ads.
And this argument is isn't tiring?
Do you have to use archaic wording and measurement because the british did?
Seems like a you problem? May be grow up and stop blaming your dad for all your problems?
Spoiled brat that used to shoot birds in youth reaches adulthood and starts shooting bigger things
The name football comes from the fact that it's descended from...wait for it...rugby football, a term in wide use in Britain.
And to had to that, soccer comes from the term Association Football (hence A.F.C. -> Association Football Club) but since it was too long, the British shortened it to Soccer and it was the prefered term going back as far as the late 19th century. Refering to it as football regained popularity in the UK during the 1960s. As for Gridiron Football, the first part of the name was dropped long ago as at the time all football sports were simply called "football" in North America (this includes Rugby).
And yes this joke is sooo tired, my first reaction was "oh we're going back to making those lame repeated memes that made me quit 9gag 10 years ago"
What? The first pic is clearly a game of soccer