I've seen parasite check his bag

Holy shit this thread

Meme : weird event happens at restaurant, only context is that man was hiding his actions for whatever reason"

ITT: FUCKING WIVES AMIRITE

WHAT WAS HE HIDING?

The reason for his obesity?

"WHAT WAS HE HIDING?"

Well, meatballs, obviously.

You just dont understand, some people need to do recon missions before comitting to the charge.

This reminds me of how when I was young, my dad would get us an extra order of desert when mom left to use the restroom. It was the best dad move. Ofc I was an anxiety case while trying to eat the ice cream before mom got back, it was that intense anxiety where it felt something was following you. Do you know? No. All you know is that every fiber in your being told you you needed get out of that old warehouse as soon as possible. You keep running, avoiding roots and rocks. You keep second guessing yourself. Where we alone? You look to see if Sam followed you but he's nowhere to be seen. You swear you two looked at eachother with the same chill just moments ago. You call out to him, but you hear nothing. You slow down and turn around but the sun has already set and the trees shroud any sense of direction. You call out again, but regret it instantly.

The weight of something big is coming.

You pick a direction and go in an all out sprint. You don't know where you are going but know whatever has been tracking you is behind you. You are now shrieking call for Sam but he is long gone. The ground below you shifts as you come to a steep decline. You stumble but catch yourself, only to find the moss on the ground won't hold you. You slip and roll into a ravine, and as you fall your ankle hits a rock. You don't know if it's broken but at this point you know that whatever is behind you is worse than the pain of each step. You are limping but moving, but now you are losing ground. The bushes burst open behind you and in the shock you fall back down, firmly breaking the leg you tried so hard to ignore. You turn over while you writhe in pain to see what remained of Sam being held by what couldn't be a man but couldn't be a beast. He comes forward smelling the air furiously. You didn't want to believe it, but Sam was taken and soon you will be too. In your final moments, a face finally comes 2 inches from yours.

You didn't want to believe things could go south so fast. You didn't want to believe Sam was dead. You didn't want to believe you never would sleep in your bed or eat rainbow Sherbet again. You didn't want to believe your eyes when you saw him-

Shia LaBeouf.

Anyway when mom came back dad would always take the heat for us, but he's a funny guy and mom couldn't stay mad for long.

Bro wants to eat his own meatballs

Wife wants to eat his meatballs, and not ask for her own

Bro gets early, gets his own meatballs.

Wife gets to restaurant, sees new meatballs

She starts picking on husband meatballs

Bro shares

Wife happy

Everyone happy

Meh.

I was getting a Chinese takeout a while back. A guy came in to pick up his order and sank 4 cans of Carlsberg Special Brew (7.5% ABV) in the 5 minutes it took them to get it ready for him. He wasn't savouring this beer, he was just fucking necking it as fast as possible.

Who knows the struggles other people are going through and the things they do to get through the day without losing it.

Maybe he wanted to be sure he tried and ordered the best item so that it would impress her.

“ Wait… I worry what you heard was, ‘Give me a lot of bacon and eggs.’ What I said was, give me all the bacon and eggs you have. Do you understand?”