@[email protected]

I assume you're Gen-Z too! Socializing and Dating without Instagram and Snapchat is impossible! Don't listen to others here shouting "get their email!" "ask them to install Signal!" "ask them to install PixelFed!! "They are not worth your friendship if they don't want to talk to you if you don't have Instagram!". I know the real world ground reality having experienced it earlier, you have no other choice than making an IG and Snap account. Everyone you talk in real life will ask for your "ID" after sometime, which means IG or Snap ID depending on where you live. No "normal person" (as in normie) will install Signal or PixelFed for you. I have studied in 2 separate universities and only knew 3 girls who didn't have Insta or Snap. The foids who spout nonsense here are millennials who have no idea on how Gen-Z interact with each other or individuals who are too far into the privacy-anonymity spectrum. Anyway, you can take the following steps which will preserve your privacy in IG and Snap:

1. Create IG and Snap accounts using newly created emails.

2. Use AI generated or heavily AI altered pic as your profile pic in IG. So Meta wouldn't be able to meaningfully use your photo to train their facial recognition systems.

3. If you decide to post photos on Insta, alter them heavily using AI or Photoshop.

4. Use ASCII empty characters for your "name" in Insta and Snap. Use random username generators for usernames.

5. Keep Bio empty, if it doesn't allow you to keep it empty, use ASCII empty characters.

6. Don't watch or post Insta reels.

7. Don't like, comment or share in Insta.

8. Don't watch stories in Snap.

9. Use open source frontend apps on Android to browse Insta and Snap (I previously used a good app for Insta (I forgot it's name) which allowed you to control which pages to show. Like you can choose to stop displaying reels and feeds section and make it only to display DM's. This is very useful if your only aim on Insta is to use it for messaging. It even had a "Ghost mode" which will allow you privately browse Insta without alerting anyone- it'll keep your online status as "offline" even when you're online and turns off typing indicators for DM's and groupchats and you can videocall anyone without showing them you're online. Like I said, I forgot it's name, I'll link it here if I find it).

10. "Build a profile"- follow all of your Job/University/School friends. This will make your profile look less suspicious. Remember - It IS suspicious to not have Insta and Snap in this day and age. The fact that you didn't have both of these apps this far itself will make you look suspicious in the first place. So first build a profile.

11. Some have recommended apps like Insular, Shelter and Island to Isolate apps but let me tell you the truth- they will have no effect. Meta and Snapchat will still track and surveil you.

12. De-activate account after your purpose is resolved (only on IG) - Deactivate after your work is done. Say like the girl you were talking to has officially become your girlfriend. Don't do this on Snapchat as Snap doesn't have separate deactivate and delete account options. Your Snap account will get "permanently deleted" if you don't re-activate within 6 months.

13. Using VPN, TOR and other similar proxies will get your account getting flagged by Meta's spam filters and you will have to verify your identity via a real-time video verification (which has got scarily accurate in recent years) or submitting a government provided ID. Which is against what you're trying to achieve. So don't do that.

Good luck!

Phone number can be problematic to share in some areas of the world, so it does depend on where you are, but email shouldn't be an issue in general. So easy to get an additional, private email address and use both at the same time.

I also don't have most mainstream social media anymore but have noticed a significant drop in people asking for it these days. Might just be my location in a city with a lot of progressive, tech savvy people, though.

I mostly use phone number and/or Signal these days.

If they shun you for not having instragram, find better social circles.

it feels too personal to ask for someone number when I just met them

Signal usernames invalidate the phone number argument.

Make a pixelfed, people want to know you we ask for IG

What I've done since Instagram is practically necessary for networking at my university, is using shelter for android I have Instagram Revanced in a work profile, and I've opted out from everything possible in the app, which is easy but not simple. I also have my account set to private and no posts, although maybe I'll need some at some point idk. I also have trackercontrol to block trackers, and I use the Facebook Container add-on for Firefox as well as Ublock Origin.

How is having somebody’s phone number more personal than having access to an account where you can see all the photos they take and shit? I’d just ask for their number.

Anyone have any advice?

• Ask them for their number, and see how it goes? Worst case, they will say 'no', end of the story. Maybe the will ask why you don't have IG and that will be the start of an interesting conversation.
• Try to meet different kind of people? I mean it seriously. I know a lot of people around me who have IG/Facebook/X and so on but at the same time none of them make it a requirement to use it.
• Use a second phone/number for that crap content only? I barely use my 'real' phone (I have nothing installed on it beside what I'm required to use) still I do own a second phone just so I can easily share a number with all the services and various craps that ask for one. It's a phone I never answer to, despite it being constantly harassed by callers. And that peace of mind (my real number is almost spam free) only costs me the 2€/month (plus the phone, I purchased used). You should be able to do something similar for social networks: have a second phone without anything personal on it, just with IG.
• Accept that you're doomed to use IG because it's with those 'IG people' and no others you want to spend your time with? I like to spend time with people reading books, it's kinda expected we indeed read books. Would I not like to read, I would not spend as much time with them.

Find a way to use Instagram to drive them to another app, like this: https://lemmy.world/post/21620691

same, i just say I don't do instagram and tell them my local whatsapp equivalent's id or phone number. I've tried using instagram a few times but it can't be used anonymously at all.