this post was submitted on 30 Jun 2025
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Slop.

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 day ago

Real men hold their phone with their penis.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 days ago

the real ultimate manly way is to ditch the smart phone and only have the push-to-talk Nextel 2 way, have truncated conversations over a super loud speaker about equipment only ever referred to by its manufacturer "the Polaris, the Chevy, the Kubota", and end conversations with "you got it"

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

The problem with “weak” (low-power) poses is they make you look smaller… and feel smaller.

With your arms and elbows brought close to the body, and the shoulders and neck bending down – it practically looks like you're curling up in a shell.

So go against the norm and adopt “strong” (high-power) poses when it comes to using your phone. It takes a good amount of confidence to do… as well as accepting the fact that it'll raise some eyebrows.

Caring about this kind of thing sounds so exhausting.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 days ago

ah yes, the "take up lots of space" School of performing Masculinity, with Head Master Larry "Wide Stance" Craig.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

This is why we need more sexy himbo leftists like Hasan

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I'm a man and therefore I must never use an umbrella in the rain, because people might think I am gay /s

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 days ago

This but not /s

I hate carrying around extra shit if I don't end up having to need it or only will need the umbrella for a minute or two

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

Today, we ask ourselves: are the straights okay? No.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

You must assert dominance over your handheld devices

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

If you ever have to deal with someone from the manosphere who talks about all the shit they do to be “more of a man” just give them a sympathetic look and say “that’s rough. I suffer from gender dysphoria, too.” And see how they react

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

Lmao, teaching men to take objectively worse pictures.

Part of my transition was learning how to take better pictures that were more flattering and that’s doing the opposite of what they recommend.

Being a man is about taking shitty photos

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (1 children)

anything other than a belt holster is gay

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

Yeah I strap my phone to a gun

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

Use your phone with both hands or just one hand (while the other jacks off your peanits)

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

frothingfash oh you hold your phone like you want to suck its dick??? not me!!! im very comfortable in my masculinity!!!!!

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

Can't look at your phone in class by holding it to your face bro, we were trained to look straight down

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

I put my axe body spray on one spritz at a time just like any other guy, fella.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (1 children)

If you're a man and even a single person thinks you look gay then your dick falls off and you have to go live in the cornfield

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

Made me think of this classic

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I swear that men style sites used to be less obsessed with gender norms since they advocated for self care like manicure and pedicure and trying unique trends like colour blocking and pulling it off or even matching colours with your SO, the heck happened?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 days ago

yeah, I remember watching some videos of his about something obscure like "shirt stays" before I discovered suspenders.

before this guy was a style blogger, they were a career uniformed cop... so I think this is all just going back to their roots of being a costumed loser giving swagger lessons.

also, probably a textbook example of audience driving content... because one can imagine the segment of the audience most faithful to a blogger with "real men" in the title.

and like the other poster said, they ran out of actual style/fashion material.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

I assume they just made it thru all the other material

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Which gender is it if I drop it all the time

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

please i need t o know

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Don't be a PUSSY, eating your CEREAL with a SPOON like a WOMAN. Be a MAN and eat your frosted flakes like a BOSS by putting each flake on your COCK and flicking it into your MOUTH like a REAL ALPHA.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

Fuck. I’ve been eating my cereal with chopsticks. Now I feel pretty effeminate.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Okay but what's the feminine way to hold your phone

/srs

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (1 children)

As far as I can tell from the outside, the feminine way is with one of those weird attachments that pop out attached to the back of the phone. Most women in my life love that shit and I don’t know if I’ve ever seen a man with one attached to his phone lol

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

I feel so validated

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

Wow I searched "holding phone stock image" and you are correct, this is dino hands right?

There is one alternative available while still retaining femininity

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

denji-just-like-me but with your phone

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

I'm a real man so I hold my phone like andrew dice clay smoked a cigarette, with my arm wrapped around the back of my head and wearing a leather jacket

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

You especially hold your phone like a bad ass when you hold the phone a few inches from you face with speaker phone on so everyone else in the grocery store can hear the entire conversation from both sides.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (2 children)

hold the phone with either 1 or 2 hands

very-smart

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

I have been resting my phone on my penis as any man should. And now suddenly that's wrong?????

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

I prefer the feminine approach of holding the phone with 0 or 3 hands.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

Whenever I see a guy with a phone, I'm always thinking "Wow, that guy sure is holding his phone in an unmanly way." instead of just not giving a shit. It's really important for men to remember that all strangers are judging their every action and behaviour and rating it on a scale of 1 to 10 manlynesses.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (1 children)

It's so fucking stupid it would be funny if it weren't so toxic

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

Yeah, these manosphere types are so fucking gross, and these sorts of articles that prey on their insecurities are so disgusting and manipulative. It reminds me a lot of trashy magazines from the 90s, always telling women they need to lose weight and look good because everyone is judging them. Except in this case, the type of person they are trying to mold these guys into is an aggressive asshole who refuses to ever hear the word "no"

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Lol this is what I'm doing right now because I can't see shit.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I feel personally attacked

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

Calling it elderly sigma. stalin-approval

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 days ago

And gay too