this post was submitted on 08 Jun 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 5 months ago

This sounds like it's written by someone that's not 18 currently. Posting on 4chan but not applying online? Biking for applications in person sounds like some old people thing back in the day.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 5 months ago

Well.. I'll never get the time back I wasted on reading this super boring and pointless story

[–] [email protected] 36 points 5 months ago (1 children)

picking up applications

What year is it

[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 months ago

Wait there is that tattoo thing, 2002 it is.

[–] [email protected] 40 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

There are jobs and there are jobs. But well, some are born as cashier, I guess. What do I know. Give it a few more years of doing the same boring repetition over and over, for little to no pay.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago (1 children)

because what he was doing before is way better, right?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

My biggest takeaway from this green text is go to Long John silver's to be greeted by a fapaholic and just look at his hands and look in his eyes and picture him being a fapaholic while he's handling your cash and he's got his hands all over that cash register and he hands you your paper bag full of greasy food.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

I can't stop reading Fapaholics in the Trap-A-Holics voice.

Fap-A-Holics! Real. Fap. Shit.

This is a certified Goon classic Fap-A-Holics mixtape.

Damn son where'd you fap this?

Fap-A-Holics beeitch, you ain't know?

Bonus video of the OG recording lol.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 5 months ago

It's a good starting point though. Sometimes you just need something to give yourself some momentum to get going with work

[–] [email protected] 35 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Hell yeah bro, get locked in for that corporate grind. Getting those positive vibes out, absolutely hammering those orders, and staying locked in.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

I understand that reference. But had to look up his name. Davis Clarke.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 5 months ago (2 children)

When you're young and need money, a dead-end job is better than no job. Fund your search for higher sights to set

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

The tragic part of spending all one's time & energy in a dead end job, just to barely financially survive, it kinda drains you (physically, mentally, emotionally, morale, creatively, sucks out all your life force) and that's where the tragic dead end truly begins.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago (1 children)

When need money

think you can simplify that equation

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

Nah, trust fund babies exist, and old people may actually have worse outcomes from working a labor-intensive job just to pay bills

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

old people was my point, it's not limited to youth who need money, our society takes the elderly and jerks them around into the labor force.

[–] [email protected] 62 points 5 months ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 36 points 5 months ago

One of the more believable greentexts I’ve read, and likely for this reason.

[–] [email protected] 96 points 5 months ago (3 children)

Well yeah, it's a slice of life, not the Hero's Journey.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Could've made it more interesting though

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Yeah could've added some fiction at the end like a cute girl walks in and they live happily ever after.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

Idk about adding, I would've just changed what is already there to be more interesting

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Its totally the heros journey, libertarian fanfic, long john silvers AU

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

Long John silvers gold?

[–] [email protected] 63 points 5 months ago

This motherfucker when their wife tells them about their day: there was no beginning, middle, or end; the climax wasn't revealed in chronological order; the hero is clearly a Mary-Sue...

[–] [email protected] 19 points 5 months ago

yeah, stories dont walk, duh

[–] [email protected] 195 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Well, he aced lesson one on how to get a job: don't masturbate during the interview (unless that's something you and the interviewer have agreed upon ahead of time for some reason)

[–] [email protected] 74 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

You mean: be willing to work for minimum wage and actually capable of holding a conversation, even if awkward.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 5 months ago

Yeah I was just waiting for that to happen, esp with the sweaty outfit, I was expecting a new kink unlock experience. Or on the job, or when locking up...