this post was submitted on 27 Jun 2025
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Laittakaa meemejä tänne.

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Royal Fuckup (midwest.social)
submitted 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
 
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[–] [email protected] 14 points 10 hours ago (2 children)

I don't think most Europeans would think their royals are classy at all. Even if we stripped them of their power now they'd just be rich people living in large houses their family could already afford anyway. They're basically government pawns we keep around for tradition and to make deals with vain foreign leaders. China does something similar, but they used pandas. If you're a good little friend of the totalitarians, you get to have a panda in your zoo.

You think the leaders of shit holes are going to be interested in presidents? Nah, they meet presidents every day. If you want to placate them, you take our the big guns. You go "Who's a big boy president? That's right, it's you! You can have a sleepover in a real palace just like in the Disney movies! Everyone thinks you're such an important big boy!" These leaders aren't rational-thinking, they're coming from (sub)cultures where displays of wealth and status mean something, and I bet nothing makes a vain guy happier than to say they made a king entertain them. They feel like they're such big shits pushing around our stage puppets.

You'd think those foreign leaders would feel belittled but sending royalty to shitholes works great, politically. The national news broadcaster has this trick where they're officially "royal Dutch news" (because of weird laws, you don't need to be related to royalty in any way to be granted that title as a company) and yelling "royal Dutch news" instead of "Dutch news" when trying to ask questions actually works. Even in countries with presidents. It's extremely stupid but it's been proven to work.

I don't think the royals are anything special but I also don't think the political circus around electing a president and the endless drama that follows will be any cheaper (or better, for that matter). With the way things are going in this country, I'll take King Wimlex over President Wilders, thank you very much.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 hour ago

China does something similar, but they used pandas

Takenoko intensifies

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 hours ago* (last edited 10 hours ago)

Also Trump was super delighted that he could sleep in a Dutch palace. The charm offensive by the Dutch royalties worked on him since he wasn’t as belligerent at the NATO summit as he normally is, so the adults in the room could do the talking.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Bro is about to shoot his own coffee mug

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 hours ago

It's ok, it's a BB gun, all it'd do is break the cup and maybe hurt his wittle hand like a bee sting.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

I've literally never heard any human being praise or admire royalty, aside from Diana.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 13 hours ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 21 minutes ago

Compromise: we can keep monarchy but from now on they all have to wear bunny ears.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 59 minutes ago

Only praise and admiration from very old people, for everyone else he's basically just a goofy mascot that keeps doing weird things.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 12 hours ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 hours ago

As long you don't say the hard r

[–] [email protected] 4 points 12 hours ago

yeah but he didn't wear as many hats

[–] [email protected] 32 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

Americans: Our system is the best because we don't have royalty, we have a President instead!

American President: Plating his palace with gold and being completely above the law.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

The American king is far more absolute than any European king.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 hours ago

No kings, but an Emperor! Hail Emperor Norton!

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emperor_Norton

[–] [email protected] 10 points 18 hours ago

What a fucken dork lmfao

[–] [email protected] 24 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Just for the record: He's not royalty

[–] [email protected] 11 points 21 hours ago

Thought the gun was a squirt gun connected to the (wine? champagne? w/e) bottle, now that would've been classy

[–] [email protected] 21 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

Nobody's saying that our royals are classy, except themselves, their paid weirdos, and, weirdly enough, americans.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 20 hours ago

idiot americans worship money and think being royalty means being loaded

[–] [email protected] 1 points 21 hours ago

Helen Keller would produce better quality tats but at least he leans into his trash identity enough to identify from a distance

[–] [email protected] 6 points 22 hours ago (2 children)

is that really a "mom" tattoo? i guess might as well if you're going the sick ass panther route

also is that an airsoft gun? and is he drinking champagne in a coffee cup?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 13 hours ago

It's a royal thing, clearly us peasants won't get it

[–] [email protected] 3 points 19 hours ago

Literally every tattoo he has is generic as hell lmao.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

Terrible Trigger Discipline but that looks like it's a BB gun...

[–] [email protected] 2 points 22 hours ago

I hear he has lots of sex.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 22 hours ago

It looks like he wanted a big chest piece but chickened out after the lining and never went back to get it finished.

[–] [email protected] 52 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago) (3 children)

honorable mention: princess märtha louise of norway is a clairvoyant married to an american conspiracy theorist and serial rapist.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 hour ago

Yeah sadly she counts as a royal, but the civilian in the picture is her sister in laws son pre marriage into the royal family. So technically not a royal, but might as well be.

Most people in Norway like the king and the queen, and the crown Prince and the crown princess, and their children (together), they used to like this guy too before he got caught doing all this illegal shit

[–] [email protected] 38 points 21 hours ago (2 children)

Well, his Wikipedia article is horrifying

He asserts that casual sex attracts subterranean spirits that make an impression on the inside of women's vaginas and offers exercises to "clean out" said vaginas; he writes that children get cancer because they want it;

I hope her first husband kept their daughters away from him

[–] [email protected] 9 points 15 hours ago

First husband took his own life, so there's that

[–] [email protected] 22 points 21 hours ago* (last edited 21 hours ago)

There's a whole lot of words there that I do not like together

[–] [email protected] 21 points 22 hours ago

Reading about this family just reminds me of this:

[–] [email protected] 16 points 23 hours ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 40 points 23 hours ago

the son of the crown princess of norway. she had him before she was married to the crown prince so he's not an official part of the royal family, but he's a major pain in their ass anyway.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 23 hours ago (2 children)

Son of the Norwegian crown prince. You'll be unsuprised to learn that he stands accused of many sexual assaults.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 22 hours ago

He is not royal. His mother married a royal

[–] [email protected] 19 points 23 hours ago

crown princess*. he's the "bonus prince" because she had him before she married the prince.