Asklemmy

I once broke my neighbor's sliding glass doors with rocks.

A neighbor kid and I were really stupid when we were 9-10 years old, and my next door neighbor's house had been empty for a while because they rented it out. So we thought it would be a good of fun idea to go through the broken fence between our yards, and chuck the decorative rocks (pretty big ones, not pebbles) at the glass and make it shatter. We broke one open, and then another, then went inside to check out the empty place. We started to go at the third one when my brother came outside and heard the loud smashing.

Cops were called, in the end both of us were very apologetic and told them everything.

Dec 20, 1985

My dad drive into our driveway with his brand new 1986 Porsche 944 Turbo. After showing me and my little brother, his brand new car, he then broke the news that our Christmas would be a “little light this year.” I put an entire bag of sugar in his gas tank that night.

His Christmas was a little light that year, the fuck.

Edit: Oh, hell yes, I absolutely told him I did it. On Christmas morning.

Edit 2: as an adult, I still think it’s one of the most awesome cars I’ve ever known (my fav car is still the BMW 2002, tho). He got a new one - the fuck - and I later learned how to drive stick in that car. He has still never forgiven me, although I have still never forgiven him for what he did then or in the decades following. We haven’t spoken in years.

As the years go by, I only grow more proud of my 6 year-old self for punishing that selfish fuck for putting himself before his kids/family. And I’d do it again in a heartbeat. Also, my mom laughed about it at the time and always has since.

As a kid, I kinda had anger issues and would get frustrated easily. I broke the screen of my GBA SP by throwing it against a wall after not being able to solve a room in Mario vs. Donkey Kong. Similarly, I threw my iPod Touch on the floor after losing in a game called Bad Apples which broke the glass but the iPod itself still worked afterwards.

I really wish I still had that SP, as replacing the screen isn't that hard. It even was a limited edition one as well...

I noticed that the computer was magnetic and played with magnets around it. The hard drive was totally wiped. Now my parents could have reinstalled the operating system but they just got a new computer instead.

ITT: kids with wayyyy too much time on their hands

• Latchkey kid

My dumbass was shooting marbles out of my paintball gun. Worked great, but I nailed a few windows on our neighbor's car!

I really, really liked disassembling stuff, and then not knowing how to reassemble. The most regrettable thing I disassembled was probably the Wii U. It would be nice to still have one, but I also really don't feel like buying one, so, yeah.

You guys could've fixed that! You'd just have to open it up to reset or replace the button and hit the Degauss in the settings (assuming it had the option)!

Me : Kicked a football into our neighbour's dining room. Said sorry . Dad fixed it for them. A week later , again kicked it into their dining room. Got an earful . Never took penalties from that spot again.

My bro : Climbed on top of our TV at home like King Kong and the table broke. Him, the TV and the table all came down. My dad was as mad as godzilla.

When I was around 12, I was learning about overclocking, and accidentally killed my dad's graphic card, an Nvidia FX 5900.

I vividly remember launching The Sims 2 to test my overclock, when suddenly the screen started turning on and off (the video driver was probably crashing and restarting), and after I reset the PC, there were 2 green lines on the screen and XP was stuck in 640x480 16 colors because not even the basic display driver was able to load.

My dad was mad obviously because it was an expensive card, the damage wasn't covered by the warranty, and he was into gaming too at the time. I was stuck with integrated graphics for about a month while we waited for the geforce 6000 series to come out.

I was so scared of overclocking after this happened, I didn't try it again until a few years later years later when I had my own computer (and killed another card, a 9800GX2).

My jaw.

Kitchen window. About 2x3 metres if I remember right.

We had a trampoline in our backyard, outside the kitchen so mum could watch us while cooking or whatever. There was a huge hill (our house was in a bit of a mountainous area), and we decided to throw some rocks down the hill and bounce them off the trampoline… but we were uncoordinated 10 year olds so we missed every time. And it was just a bunch of little stones gathering in our backyard.

Then I found one rock. Pretty big, had to lift it with two hands and shot-put it down the hill. That was the one that we finally landed on the trampoline. And it bounced right through the kitchen window.

I suspect i might be the winner here. My friend had an alley behind his house along with a nice strip of open land near a busy road. Eventually a strip mall was built and then another large commercial building started to go up. Being basically behind my friends house we walked over to this new building on weekend to check out the construction site.

The building was being built with cement block and had lots of scaffolding and yet-unused block scattered around. I found a pipe-bender - a very heavy tool made out of high quality steel - and found you could just tap on of these cement blocks and it would shatter to pieces. I was fascinated, as were my friends. I have no idea how many cement blocks we destroyed over the next couple of days, but it was a huge number. Then we decided to see if we could go through a wall with the pipe bender... we could indeed, making a hole in the side of the building we could walk through. Looking around we eventually realized what we'd done was awful.... we had decimated this construction site. We finally slinked away and come Monday when the crew returned, police were called and neighbors interrogated but thankfully with privacy fences all around, none of the neighbors saw anything. 11 and 12 yr olds are stupid.

Sigh...

When I was in the 3rd grade, our class had to do reports on countries around the world and we were all assigned a country. I got Egypt. Coincidentally, some friends of my parents had recently gotten back from a trip to Egypt. My parents asked their friends if there was anything I could bring in to use for my presentation. They let me borrow this little statue they got. It was an eagle with a hat, I think it was a depiction of Horus. It was carved out of some really nice white stone, maybe marble or something? I brought it into school, put it on my desk, and waited patiently to stand up and do my report. When I stood up, I bumped my desk, and the statue fell to the ground and broke in half.

Now monetarily this may not have been the most "expensive" thing, but it was the souvineer that this family brought back from Egypt that they had on their mantle to always remember the trip. It was priceless.

Why the fuck would you let a 7 year old bring your breakable souvineer to school for a class project?

Anyway, those people stopped being friends with my parents after that, so I have a feeling it was either expensive or meant a lot.

This hurts me to think about. Why did you have to ask this question?

A motorcycle back in the late 90s when I was like 9 or 10?

We were at a dealership because my dad was thinking about buying a motorcycle. At one point, they put my younger brother on a motorcycle because it was cute or whatever. After they took him off the bike, and my parents and the salesguy moved onto another motorcycle, I wanted to try. So I did. And I tried to be careful, knowing it could fall over.

Getting on was no issue. And getting off was no problem either. Until I was like a few feet away from the bike..and it fell over. Shattered the windshield.

Even though it was an accident, the dealer tried to get my parent's to pay up. And I think my parents would've been willing to pay something...except the dealer wanted, I believe, $800. The bike was probably only a few thousand bucks -- I actually have no clue how much the bike was, but, as an adult, I know how much bikes are. No way a windshield was a third of the price of the bike. Not in the 90s, not today. So my dad and the dealer got into a shouting match. We left, and the dealer tried to get our license plate number as we drove off.

Nothing ever happened with that. No cops were called or anything, as far as we know. Besides, the dealer should have insurance for these situations. But since I wasn't supposed to be on the bike in the first place...I got in tons of trouble. Got my ass beat by my mom, got grounded, couldn't go to a sleepover I was supposed to go to...

Definitely the most expensive thing I broke. At least based on what the dealer was demanding.

Nothing extremely expensive. Just a DS. That, or an old Asus laptop I had that ran horrible windows 8. With the laptop, Best Buy geek squad had said how the best course of action would have been just buying a new computer rather than fixing it. Don't remember all the damage, but it wouldn't even boot if I remember correctly.

the garage. I was 6 or 7, my mom was undergoing a major health situation and the medication wasn't doing her mental processes any favors. One morning she was running late and so asked me to start her car. I'd never started a car in my life, I had no idea what to do and I couldn't reach the pedals so I asked my younger sibling to help out. I stayed on the floor and operated the pedals, my sibling was in charge of the key.

mind you, this was a stickshift and it was parked in the driveway, facing the garage door.

I have no idea what we actually did, I only remember the crashes as we went through the garage door and through the back wall. The front of the car now blocking the alley, we yanked the key ran to hide because we had just taken down a fucking building ruined mom's new car, and thought we were going to be killed. Of course she instantly realized what happened and knew that she was at fault so when she found us we were of course in no trouble; but man, what a ride that was...