this post was submitted on 31 May 2025
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[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago

Pocket sand!

...Hanitizer

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago

"Masturbating Formula with Vitamin M"

See, the version without Vitamin M is less effective...

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago

How I read in my dreams:

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 days ago

Fission Mailed Successfully

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 days ago

That’s like 7,5 million Germans.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago

Common misconception uggh. You put it on sand to make hands. Duh

Why else would they call it a handitiser

/S

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 days ago (1 children)

"Masturbating formula with Vitamin M"

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago

Oh is that what that said - I was like wtf is Vitamin 2!?!

[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 days ago (1 children)

It seems the original post was deleted, but I found this version with more pixels. Sadly, someone added some shit all over it. I might try to edit it out later.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

0,09% aren't enough.

~~DIESE KOMMENTARSEKTION IST NUN EIGENTUM DER BRD!~~

Let's make it more fun, a chaotic comment chain:

DIESE

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago

SLOTTERMEIER

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

All you Krauts better watch your backs!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago

There is nothing wrong with my backs.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 days ago (4 children)

Curious how the "an" in Germans is in lowercase when the rest is uppercase

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I could tell by the pixels.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 days ago

The illusion is good, balanced enough to trick skimmers

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 days ago

For inflection. GermAHNs.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago

Well, the "s" is lower case, too

[–] [email protected] 28 points 3 days ago (2 children)

You're right. Almost makes me think it might be photoshopped.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

Are you saying the internet could be lying to me?! :shocked-pikachu:

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago

Also I think the thumb in the upper part of the picture has another thumb.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Interestingly, hanitizer is what I call the sanitizing stuff you put on you hands.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I see your dad values efficiency in his communications.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago

He's also a primary care provider lol

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

"Maximum Lasting Formula with Vitamin M"

Wow, it must be made with unobtainium!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago

That's not what it says.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Maximum Lasting

That’s not the word I saw. 😳

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago

I’m with you on this one.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I don't like sand. Its rough, it's irritating especially when it speaks german.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Schutt up and eat your zand. Do not force me to go for ze Labskaus!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

But my Sandschneidemaschine is broken!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

The Sandschneidemaschinenmechanikermeister will take care of that.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 days ago

Man, that language is crazy.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 days ago

Jetzt werd' bloß nicht frech hier, du ferngesteuerte Unterhose!

[–] [email protected] 70 points 3 days ago (1 children)

That looks like Hans Sanitizer.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I spent way too much time trying to figure out what percentage of the German population are named “Hans” to see how effective this would be. According to this site and assuming a population of 84m, there’s about 0.01%. This product claims to be 0.09% effective against Germans, so it seems to be Sanitizing more than just Hans.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago

My efforts produced .25% as the number indicating this only works on the weakest hans.