Take that creationists, 6001 proves God couldn't have done it

I first went about the humane capture of the wildlife of C-100. A few peacocks were caught with bear traps, an iguana was captured via a falling piano, and a peacock bass was shot in the face with a shotgun, all in line with the standards set by the Florida Constitution [3].

Truly gold.

Edit: Didn't realize this was Immaterial Science - my favorite is the FUPLC-NMR-CE6-GC-IR-ICP-MS-MS-MS-MS (pdf warning)

So this is obviously satire but reading this it just sounded way too close to current reality for comfort.

I know that parts of the document are acme levels over the top but other parts sincerely read as if written by your average Maga idiot

I was tired of being a Darwinist. Now I follow the writings of Dickens; I'm a Dickhead.

Clicked thinking it was legit. Good find OP!

Only a few bites because people, understandably, aren't biting that headline.

Share a screenshot of the article instead and they'll be all over it.

At first I thought it was satire, but when I saw the writer had the scientific Pokédex entries I knew it was legit

The inclusion of Pokédex Entry numbers is great.
Also, I like the sources cited for the paper. One of them is "Pigeon-Elephant Theory: the real origin of humans – Journal of Astrological Big Data Ecology by B McGraw"

This evidence is certainly in contrast to those who believe, based on the writings of Charles Dickens alone, that the Earth is around 4.5 billion years old.

🤣 this writer is genius

How soon before someone is citing this article as evidence? 😩

You got me. This one is too good.

We’re expected to believe that the peacocks personally recounted their lineage? In English? I feel like the author is just making things up at that point.