Hi there and welcome back to another episode of Bitch Slap Kitchen, where we cook food like it owes us money. Today we're making some delicious backhand chicken.

Suspend a whole chicken in midair form some string or something, haul back, and swing at about mach 5, a little less. You're probably not going to have any intact glass anywhere in your house and you'll probably set off some car alarms in the shopping district but you'll have a table ready main course in milliseconds.

His number are off due to the idea that chicken is cooked at 400F. Yikes!

OMG, I asked copilot to read the text and fix it to 168 degrees F.

I expected it to give me text and for it to be horrible,

what It did was so much worse and so must more impressive.

So has anyone who's actually cooked a chicken before done the math? Because my guy just slapped this poor bird into pure carbon. Did he mean to do 205°F? It's still too high, but it would at least be edible.

In general, chicken needs to be heated to 74C or 165F for a few seconds to kill off dangerous pathogens.

Here is a list of other times and temperatures for chicken to be considered safe

Introducing the pneumatic oven range. Place the chicken in the can and press the button... No mess cooking and bone meal blending! High calcium foods!

Yeah yeah we get it, Newton will fry your hand and pls don't cook a chicken to 205°C core temp.

BUT! What kinda physics major forgets Newton AND the fact that you won't convert kinetic energy into heat with 100% efficiency?

I know, three math majors in a trench coat, that's who'll forget it.

Where's the link to the YouTube video where someone tried this? I remember listening to it last time someone posted this.

So, how many slaps to cook Stephen Miller?

Fucking nerds in the comments^l^ ^love^ ^it^

Is that less or more the energy of your average Falcon Punch?