this post was submitted on 17 Apr 2025
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[–] [email protected] 12 points 20 hours ago (2 children)

Obligatory Excalibur isn't the sword in the stone that made Arthur king, it's the sword the Lady of the Lake gave him. Caliburn made him king.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 14 hours ago

Listen. Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 19 hours ago

We now have a new Queen.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

she has a better claim to the throne than the royal family...

[–] [email protected] 6 points 19 hours ago

Only the Greys with their breeding program know the real truth.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 22 hours ago* (last edited 22 hours ago) (1 children)

I mean, if I went 'round saying I was an emperor, just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 19 hours ago

You had me at bint.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago

Ahh damn, send her to the US to take charge. Never through this day would come.

...

please?

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I didnt know we had a Queen, I thought we were an autonomous collective

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago

Queen, dark and terrible as the sea. all shall love her And despair.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 day ago

She'd probably rule way better than the current lot

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 day ago (3 children)

It's in surprisingly good condition.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 16 hours ago

Yeah last king brits got was already old as fuck. This one has a good shot for a new record.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 day ago

the sword never tarnishes, because it's built with the hopes and dreams of all People

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 day ago (4 children)

She lifted it from the lake? I thought those things are heavy as fuck

[–] [email protected] 1 points 16 hours ago

This is a common misconception from their depictions in the movies showing the characters treating them like hammers, both in terms of how they swing them and sometimes in terms of how they hit enemies with the blade never cutting anything.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 day ago

I visited a museum where there you could handle exact replicas of the swords and maces they had on display. The edges were blunt and the short chains they were attached to were bolted to the stone floor, so no one could steal them or do any damage with them.

But if you knelt down, you could get the feel of wielding them in action. One handed sword was really light and even my then 13-year old son could handle the two handed one.

I had read that they weren't heavy, but I was still very surprised how light they actually were.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 day ago (3 children)

I always thought so too because of movies and games. One-handed swords were only about 3 lbs, and two-handed swords, like the one she found, were only around 6 lbs. Even zweihander was under 10 lbs. Crazy.

https://workingtheflame.com/heaviest-swords-in-history/

[–] [email protected] 1 points 17 hours ago

I like how it's just called two hander lol.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 day ago (1 children)

For international readers, that's:
1 handed = ~1.3kg
2 handed = ~2.7kg
Zweihander = ~4.5kg

Other measurements:
Thinkpad P14 laptop (approx 1.6kg / 3.5lbs)
1 handed = 0.8 Thinkpads
2 handed = 1.7 Thinkpads
Zweihander = 2.8 Thinkpads

Average cat (~4kg / 8.8lbs)
1 handed = 0.3 cats
2 handed = 0.7 cats
Zweihander = 1.1 cats

Tin of Heinz Baked Beans in Tomato Sauce (420g / 0.42kg /0.93lbs)
1 handed = 3.1 tins of beans
2 handed = 6.4 tins of beans
Zweihander = 10.7 tins of beans

[–] [email protected] 7 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

Zweihander = 10.7 tins of beans

Thank you for putting it into American units.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 22 hours ago

For reasons I can't remember, tins of beans is also a Lemmy unit :)

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Yeah, go grab a 5lb weight and go swing it around. It's not easy to do for long.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

No one said it doesn't take skill, practice, and strength to wield it through a battle, or that you wouldn't get tired doing so for long enough. But it isn't too heavy for a child to pick up.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 19 hours ago

Might have lost some percentage of weight to corrosion too, though it looks amazingly preserved.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 day ago

Its also how the weight is distributed that plays a huge role in how it feels

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 day ago (1 children)

The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that this little girl was to carry Excalibur. That is why she is now our Queen

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Listen. Strange children wading in ponds discovering swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago

You can tell her that if you like but she is carrying a massive sword.

[–] [email protected] 112 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Listen, strange women wadin' in ponds 'n'discoverin' swords's no basis for a system of government!

[–] [email protected] 46 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 55 points 1 day ago (1 children)

You can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you!

[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I mean, if I went around saying I was an emperor just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they’d put me away!

[–] [email protected] 38 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Help! Help! I’m being repressed! See the violence inherent in the system!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 20 hours ago

Bloody peasant!

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 day ago (1 children)

No offence, but it might be better than the situation we have

Also - what kind of swallow are you referring to?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 17 hours ago

This one's a crossbreed but based on it's coconut carrying abilities it seems to best resemble what one might expect from an African swallow.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 day ago (1 children)

"You're fooling yourself, we're living in a dictatorship!" runs through my mind a lot lately

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 day ago

"I told you, we’re an anarcho-syndicalist commune. We take it in turns to act as sort of executive officer for the week but all the decisions of that officer have to be ratified at a special bi-weekly meeting by a simple majority in the case of purely internal affairs but by a two thirds majority in the case of more"