this post was submitted on 26 Feb 2025
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Programmer Humor

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I didn't see this coming and I think it's funny, so I decided to post it here.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

Infinitesimal service. It's effectively no service but it pays better.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

gotta keep wirth's law going strong

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Announcing FemtoServices™ - One Packet at a Time!

In an era of bloated bandwidth and endless data streams, today we proudly unveil a groundbreaking approach to networking: FemtoServices™ – Connectivity, one Ethernet packet at a time!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

(Not to be confused with our premium product, ParticleServices, which just shoot neutrinos around one by one.)

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

no services, fuck you

[–] [email protected] 24 points 2 months ago (3 children)

I was going to write that every function should be a service as sarcasm, then I realized that's exactly what this article is proposing. Now I'm not even sure how to make a more ridiculous proposal than this.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

IaaS Instructions as a Service

Want to know if a value is odd? Boy have we got the API for you!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Boy have we got the API for you!

https://getfullyear.com/

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

Why would your whole function be 1 service? That is bad for scalability! Your code is bad and the function will fail 50% of the time half way through anyway. By splitting up the your function in different services, you can scale the first half without having to scale the second half.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago (2 children)

It's probably AI-supported slop.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

Yeah, I had been willing to give the author the benefit of the doubt that this was all part of a big joke, until I saw that the rest of their blog postings are also just like this one.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

Ah, you're right

[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Cant wait to set up a docker container for a service which takes a string input and transforms it into a number as the output. Full logging, its own certificate for encryption of course, 5 page config options and of course documentation. Now, you want to add two numbers together? You got the addition service set up right?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

left-pad as a service.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

Oh yeah, this is the stuff business dreams are made of.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

Neovimservices ftw

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I’m trying to understand how this is different than a concept I learned in computer science in the late 80s/early 90s called RPCs (remote procedure calls). My senior project in college used these. Yes I’m old and this was 35 years ago.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Microservice architectures are ad hoc, informally-specified, bug-ridden, slow, implementations of Erlang, implemented by people who think that "actor model" has something to do with Hollywood.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

Ok this made me chuckle out loud.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

It's basically the same concept, just implemented with a k8s cluster so you have scale-to-zero capabilities I guess

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

This is just distributed functions, right? This has been a thing for years. AWS Lambda, Azure Functions, GCP Cloud Functions, and so on. Not everything that uses these is built on a distributed functions model but a fuck ton of enterprises have been doing this for years.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

I feel like this name addresses the problem of services claiming to be microservices when they're not.

Does that even happen? cat is micro, sed is micro, systemd isn't and doesn't claim to be

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Tech moved in cycles. We come back to the same half-baked ideas every so on, imagine we just discovered the idea and then build more and more technologies on top to try to fix the foundational problems with the concept until something else shiny comes along. A lot of tech work is “there was an old lady who swallowed a fly”.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I always keep saying " You cannot plan your way out of a system built on broken fundamentals." Microservices has it's use case, but not every web app needs to be one. Too many buzzwords floating around in tech, that promise things that cannot be delivered.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

Yep micro services are great, but monoliths are just as great and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. It all depends on what the system requirements are.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

This is just the Linux way but with... Rest? Seems slow.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

Metaservices.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)

What's next? Femtofunctions

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago

You only need two of them, one for 1 and one for 0

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