this post was submitted on 30 Jan 2025
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[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 hours ago

If the title omitted 'today's' it wouldn't even lose any accuracy.

I can't be sure if I'm thinking of the morning that actually happened today.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 22 hours ago (2 children)

Keep an eye for cute butts and use them like landmarks.

"What did you do today?"

"Well, I got coffee at around 9:15 at the cafe with the cute waiter wearing his tight jeans with the wallet rub on the right back pocket. I had a meeting at 10:30 where Melissa picked up the pencil she dropped. Went to the UPS Store during my lunch break where I stood behind the silver fox with the tight cargo pants..."

Make that thirst work to your advantage.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 hours ago

"I know you from your ass better than I know your face." -Ilana Wexler

[–] [email protected] 15 points 22 hours ago (2 children)

Describe your butt so I can remember this comment

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 hours ago

callipygian

[–] [email protected] 8 points 17 hours ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 16 hours ago

Holy Jesus crap keep going so I can remember harder

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 day ago (2 children)

We have a weekly meeting at work where we talk about what we did on the weekend, and even when I technically have something to talk about, I always forget. But the stuff I do isn't very exciting anyway, and I often make up shit so they think I have an actual life uwu

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 hours ago

Told my team first week on the job about how I like outdoor stuff and I got questions like "wait, you actually touch the fish after catching it? Gross" and then I never engaged again.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

I volunteer to walk dogs at the local animal shelter, so I always just talk about the new dogs I met in those meetings haha

[–] [email protected] 1 points 56 minutes ago

Ooh, that's perfect! You can talk about all the cute dogs, everybody goes "Awww," and you're free.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 day ago
[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Are you sure about that first one?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 22 hours ago

If reality so good, why does the mind prefer dreaming?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago

my daily routine:

fall asleep > fall asleep > fall asleep

rinse and repeat